Lost New Entrepreneur

[Connornew]

Hi all,

This is lost, new entrepreneur and here is my first post. Welcome everybody!

For couple years I was manager in some companies. I got experience, college degree, foreign language and was doing very well, every single year I was getting promotion by higher position and money benefits (small, but still). I was always approved by senior managements and colleagues. Usually it was like working 8 - 17 in the office in front of my notebook wearing shirts, some phone calls in the afternoon / evening to be picked up, 2-3 business trips per year, nothing very hard and special, I was calm and comfortable person. The job was stable. I was not happy only about my salary. I was spending 80-90% percent every single month for bills, fuel, food, loans etc. I couldn't save and afford new, fancy car, new electronics (PS4 + QLED TV + home cinema for example), bigger flat and stuff I dream about... It was not about my companies I worked for, it was about my industry and working in that position for someone. I felt like life I had was the same like people I was surrendered by, just normal, grey life. I have heard about minimalists, I'm not person who enjoys simple stuff like cup of coffee etc. since I remember, unfortunately. My feelings tell me I do deserve more when it comes to money, comparing with others I feel I'm an intelligent guy.
I cannot value health, what I have, what country I'm in like my wife does, but it is just me, I was trying to change my mindset but without successes...

Despite all of above and voice telling me I do not want to be an average person, every single day I was doing the same stuff my boss told me, being comfortable and average. I got married in September this year and decided with my wife to buy a flat in different city, of course we took bank loan and spent almost everything we had to recondition. I didn't picked up any job position there in new city we live in now. I found equity partner by accident and decided spontaneously to open our company, we based on my experience and his money. Since it started, we haven't earned enough to being sure we are on the right truck with potential to expand, to be honest, we are not earning anything. The industry we are in is transportation (many competitors, agreement between companies they did many years ago etc.). This is not like innovation. The problem here is myself in my opinion. I cannot wake up early in the morning like entrepreneurs I read about, I cannot spend my time working hard. I make a plan, schedule, things to do, but I'm not disciplined and do not even half of what I should, I know that I can go for a walk, watch Netflix, play a game anytime - and this is what I do instead. I work from home, it is very hard to get up with awareness there is no deadline you need to start by, nobody stands over you.

One mistake or thing which went wrong, I give up and think it is not for me, I probably should go back to job position etc. Now, I dream to leave our business and come back to being average, but it is not a solution, once I did that, I would be dreaming back about money and things I do want, with feeling job position is not enough...

The silly thing is, I now where I would like to be with our business (what kind of office, how many vehicles, how many people, what kind of contracts etc.) but I cannot motive myself to do steps every single day consistently to accomplish that. I feel tired, sad, sleepy, downcast and unmotivated of thinking since I wake up till I go to sleep how weak I'm and what I'm missing. I'm becoming introvert, closed in home without believe I can be successful...

PS. I went to a doctor to consider if I have depression, she sad even if it is, it is very, very small and I need to find myself somewhere. I got therapy and medicates, but the result is it nothing wrong with my brain, it is probably something wrong with my approach and how I think about money, business etc.

Do you have any advises how I can fix myself? Should I continue my business? Maybe it is just not for me?

Please consider in my Maslowian model in the top is earning money and being successful at work...

Please feel free to ask questions to see more details I did not put about current situation if something is unclear....

 

[Dillon Lawrence Ltd]

Do you have any advises how I can fix myself? Should I continue my business? Maybe it is just not for me?

All questions only you can answer. But fix yourself quick because the business won't wait for you before it fails.

How much do you really want it or enjoy what you do? If you're driven (and it doesn't sound like you are) you'll strive to make it work.

 

[Mr D]

Sit down with a pen and paper. Write down what you want.
Make a list - it can be a big list if you want.

Include where you want to be, what you want to be doing.

OK you have your goals. Now work backwards from them figuring what route to take to get there.
Write down the routes and milestones you can envisage.

Sometimes its you that needs to change. Sometimes its circumstances, business, job, bills etc you need to change.

Business can have lots of ups and downs. If new to the business then your risks are higher but may still be manageable.
And sometimes the thing to do with a business is end it. Not everything works. Not every idea can be supported at that time.

 

[RobinBHM]

Working from home can be lonely.

Running your own business can be lonely -even if you work with employees, as the owner you get to take the blame for everything because thats where the buck stops and you cant off load the problems.

If you have motivation problems, it could be that your lack of focus is because you havent got yourself routine and schedule.

I would suggest every evening, write your self a task list for the next day and make sure you go to bed knowing what your first task will be next morning
To be motivated at home, start work as soon as you get up, start work early - its much easier with a list because you dont need to think over what to do, you can just get started.

Work set hours and put in frequent breaks, even just getting up and walking around for 3mins can be enough to reset your concentration.

If you find it lonely, go to a coffee shop and take work with you.

 

[Connornew]

How much do you really want it or enjoy what you do? If you're driven (and it doesn't sound like you are) you'll strive to make it work.

I'm not driven, this is true... Do I enjoy or really want it? I want the money which follow the final idea! I do not know, since I started first job I have been doing transportation, this is the only kind of industry I know, I have no interest in anything else, but I'm not sure if I enjoy this profession... Enjoying wasn't something I considered taking degree and intern towards that path.

 

[Opinion87]

Most people are average. That's life.

 

[Mr D]

Most people are average. That's life.

Individuals are not required to remain average.

 

[MOIC]

Did all the above posters read the whole Opening Post? You must have a lot of time on your hands! I got up to the middle of the second paragraph . . .

I would suggest some mild anxiety pils and to keep your feet on the ground.

Perhaps do the lottery once a month . . .

 

[Onthebrightside]

I agree with everyone above, working from home can be isolating. Join a gym, it will get you out of the house, get you fit and you will start to meet people there. The exercise in itself can be uplifting and thus give you a more positive outlook. Or look for one of the local business networking groups, not perhaps in terms of gaining business, but in terms of meeting other business orientated people who may also be working from home etc and can share experience.

I also agree with the above. Take a real basic look at the business, do a SWOT analysis, write yourself yourself a task list for each day, but most of all, stop looking for the magic answer elsewhere, it's in your mirror

 

[MBE2017]

Simple answer from someone who used to be in the transport industry, it’s you.

Put simply you are lazy, a dreamer, not a person who does what is required. Transport is one of the most competitive industries in the world, thousands of opportunities and competitors. If you are not willing to put the work in plenty of your competition will.

At present you are more suited to being an employee.

 

[ImranR]

Play Lose Yourself by Eminem on repeat.

 

[TonyJJ]

Think about what you love, what you're good at, what the world needs and does it pay you. When you go down a path that ticks all 4 boxes, the grind will be a lot smoother.

Instead of writing down arbitrary goals, create a process (with actionable steps) to reach those goals.

 

[Judy.cysd]

Simple answer from someone who used to be in the transport industry, it’s you.

Put simply you are lazy, a dreamer, not a person who does what is required. Transport is one of the most competitive industries in the world, thousands of opportunities and competitors. If you are not willing to put the work in plenty of your competition will.

At present you are more suited to being an employee.

I am agree with you,self-discipline is essential to achieve your goal,but a lot of people just lack it,that why the achievers are few, and the losers don't.

 

[NickGrogan]

Put simply you are lazy, a dreamer, not a person who does what is required.

The perfect answer right here.

 

[Chris Ashdown]

You moved to a new city and brought a house

You got rewarded in your old job with promotion but little pay

The fact is you were not very good at selling yourself and getting a pay rise, you were scared of asking your boss for more and also afraid of moving to a better paid competitor

You have also proven that you are poor at planning, nobody would move to a new city and buy a house without first investigating the job opportunities and getting a job prior to the move

Its probably your lack of planning that is effecting the growth of your new company, and you need to do something about this area to change your skills, it's easy to do a job you are told to do buy your boss, its another to make your own plans each and every day looking into the future and meeting the challenges that regularly occur

You need to become a leader and not a servant

 

[Connornew]

Put simply you are lazy, a dreamer, not a person who does what is required.

This is true, I'm. I have tendency to procrastinate.
What is the best way to change myself? Should I start reading books? How to overcome this?

At present you are more suited to being an employee.

I want to change myself instead of run away!

I am agree with you,self-discipline is essential to achieve your goal,but a lot of people just lack it,that why the achievers are few, and the losers don't.

What is a proven method to have self-discipline for person I'm currently?

 

[prophet01]

Didn't bother to read your initial post but this might be a more appropriate forum for you:
https://www.counseling-office.com/pt-forum/

 

[Connornew]

Didn't bother to read your initial post but this might be a more appropriate forum for you:

This forum seems to be dead...

 

[prophet01]

The general point being that perhaps you should be seeking psychological counselling rather than business councelling.

 

[Mr D]

This is true, I'm. I have tendency to procrastinate.
What is the best way to change myself? Should I start reading books? How to overcome this?



I want to change myself instead of run away!



What is a proven method to have self-discipline for person I'm currently?

There isn't a best way. There is a way that works for you - but you have to find it.

I would recommend books by Jim Rohn - he also has a few videos around, no idea if you can track them down.

 

[Connornew]

Psychological counselling - what topic exactly? Can you expand?

 

[prophet01]

No. I'm not qualified.

 

[Connornew]

Do you think lads I should look towards Anxiety?

 

[MOIC]

The simple truth is that you have anxieties, so it follows that you should seek medical advice at the least.

Seeing a doctor is better than asking on a forum for any medical related advice.

A doctor will be able to assess and advise a management routine for you to follow to help you cope with your anxieties, hopefully without medication, but only they will know what the best course of action is for your circumstances.

 

[Judy.cysd]

This is true, I'm. I have tendency to procrastinate.
What is the best way to change myself? Should I start reading books? How to overcome this?



I want to change myself instead of run away!



What is a proven method to have self-discipline for person I'm currently?

Hi,that is you can make a list of schedule every day that you need to do to improve yourself,then you can finish one by one with the schedule,don't think this is easy,it takes a lot of self-discipline ,you can try,and you will understand what I say.

 

[JEREMY HAWKE]

Play Lose Yourself by Eminem on repeat.

Is this some sort of video game or board game

 

[JEREMY HAWKE]

To me it looks like you are doing everything for the wrong reasons
Average Person
entrepreneur what the hell is that !
You have some sort of idea that you deserve to be different from the rest of us !

You have written a massive post on a business forum and I don't know what the hell you do
You have told us nothing about your business .What you do What it does Your products or services or plans you might have and markets you would like to explore

I will be very honest as I am a short tempered older man . I don't know anything about medical stuff and peoples feelings and all this modern day stuff .
As I said in the week
If you want sympathy you will find it in the dictionary between s££t and syphilis !

Now tell the people about what you do and maybe somebody on here may have an idea on how take it to the next level

This is a business forum not a place to talk about feelings

 

[Onthebrightside]

PS. I went to a doctor to consider if I have depression, she sad even if it is, it is very, very small and I need to find myself somewhere. I got therapy and medicates, but the result is it nothing wrong with my brain, it is probably something wrong with my approach and how I think about money, business etc.[/QUOTE]

The OP has already said they attended the doctor, had therapy and gone on meds with no effect apparently, so more of the same won't help

Stop believing you can read your way out of the doldrums or there is a magic pill and start planning a positive course of action as the people above have suggested, get your sh!t together, make and action list, plan your day the night beforehand and get on with things. By your own admission you are not getting things done because you are slumped in front of daytime TV or in your bed - get up - get on, no one can sort this out for you other than yourself!

Join a gym, go for a run in the morning, wake yourself up and get on with it!

 

[alan1302]

I will be very honest as I am a short tempered older man . I don't know anything about medical stuff and peoples feelings and all this modern day stuff

Maybe you would be less short tempered if you did know about it ;-)

 

[JEREMY HAWKE]

Maybe you would be less short tempered if you did know about it ;-)

Personally I just wish that people would stick to the facts and not go on about the way they feel or how stressed they are .
We not feckin councillors !

 

[prophet01]

Hence my earlier post

The general point being that perhaps you should be seeking psychological counselling rather than business councelling.

After posting the above I thought it might be taken the wrong way but it would appear many agree with the sentiment.

 

[Onthebrightside]

OP has sought psychological counselling and says so in his post, what he appears to be looking for here is a book / article / arrow to a magic fix. There isn't one, he needs to get up and get out there.

 

[ImranR]

Is this some sort of video game or board game

He's a motivational speaker

All I would say to the OP is..

Look, If you had one shot or one opportunity,
To seize everything you ever wanted
In one moment
Would you capture it
Or just let it slip?

Anyway... I'm off to eat Mums spaghetti. It's not on the floor yet.

 

[JEREMY HAWKE]

He's a motivational speaker

All I would say to the OP is..

Look, If you had one shot or one opportunity,
To seize everything you ever wanted
In one moment
Would you capture it
Or just let it slip?

Anyway... I'm off to eat Mums spaghetti. It's not on the floor yet.

Motivational speaker !

This is the bloke that rapped about driving a car off a cliff with his misses in the boot !

We all need mentors like this Its OK if your on the Spongebob plan I guess

 

[ImranR]

Motivational speaker !

This is the bloke that rapped about driving a car off a cliff with his misses in the boot !

We all need mentors like this Its OK if your on the Spongebob plan I guess

No no.. he rapped about his fan with a mental illness driving a car off a cliff with his misses in the boot! He was a pioneer in bringing mental health to the forefront of society!

 

[JEREMY HAWKE]

No no.. he rapped about his fan with a mental illness driving a car off a cliff with his misses in the boot! He was a pioneer in bringing mental health to the forefront of society!

Im learning more about you here than I am him

I hope your not planning on using this clown as a motivational speaker

 

[WeddingsInWales]

You cannot run a business without personal motivation. And you cannot hope to make money from a business from the start, meaning it is best to start a business while having another source of income for basic living expenses. I started my own business part time and evenings and weekends but did not leave my main job (legal expenses insurance sales) for 6 years - by which time the turnover of my business was 10 times my salary, but with 10% profit, equalled my salary, and thus I was able to cover my living expenses. Also I enjoyed my business, and though it is now a different one, I still do. Because of that I am forever focussed on improving it, improving the offers, improving the marketing (though I am not motivated by social media etc - so had to get my younger staff who are more into social media to do that side) and the first thing I want to do in the morning is get on with some new work related project that I have set myself. The first business happened to be a cash cow and made a goodly amount of money for an SME. The second business is renovating a castle and making it viable, and it is very difficult to make a profit due to the outgoings, but is still a fascinating lifestyle business and everyone in it loves working in the various niches which include weddings, ghost hunting and dog friendly b&b. I have had to become knowledgeable in wedding planning, ghost hunting and dog walks (walking every single local dog walk within 20 miles to map them out for customers). So that kept me fit for a while. Money has been made and lost in equal measure almost, but I have never had a work day where I was not eager to get on with it. If you work to make money, you will regret losing it and not enjoy the work. If you work because you enjoy the work, that is freedom to do what you want, which money cannot buy, not least, because if you do not know what you want, having moneyh won't be much use. Having a life you enjoy living is the most important thing. If you are not motivated, do something else (or get a job and put up with not really liking it, until you find what interests you).

 

[Mr D]

You cannot run a business without personal motivation. And you cannot hope to make money from a business from the start, meaning it is best to start a business while having another source of income for basic living expenses. I started my own business part time and evenings and weekends but did not leave my main job (legal expenses insurance sales) for 6 years - by which time the turnover of my business was 10 times my salary, but with 10% profit, equalled my salary, and thus I was able to cover my living expenses. Also I enjoyed my business, and though it is now a different one, I still do. Because of that I am forever focussed on improving it, improving the offers, improving the marketing (though I am not motivated by social media etc - so had to get my younger staff who are more into social media to do that side) and the first thing I want to do in the morning is get on with some new work related project that I have set myself. The first business happened to be a cash cow and made a goodly amount of money for an SME. The second business is renovating a castle and making it viable, and it is very difficult to make a profit due to the outgoings, but is still a fascinating lifestyle business and everyone in it loves working in the various niches which include weddings, ghost hunting and dog friendly b&b. I have had to become knowledgeable in wedding planning, ghost hunting and dog walks (walking every single local dog walk within 20 miles to map them out for customers). So that kept me fit for a while. Money has been made and lost in equal measure almost, but I have never had a work day where I was not eager to get on with it. If you work to make money, you will regret losing it and not enjoy the work. If you work because you enjoy the work, that is freedom to do what you want, which money cannot buy, not least, because if you do not know what you want, having moneyh won't be much use. Having a life you enjoy living is the most important thing. If you are not motivated, do something else (or get a job and put up with not really liking it, until you find what interests you).

You could make money in business from the start.
Not uncommon. My first business it took me a week to make enough profit to cover my initial start up expenses.
Other businesses have taken less time, one took longer, a whole 10 days.

Say you go to a warehouse and spend £50 on stuff. List them for sale on ebay, your first month your expenses are under £150 and you could sell the stuff maybe £700+
Suppose you pick the right stuff - you pay the total monthly expenses in a couple of weeks from gross profit. Making money thereafter.

Making enough money from a business to cover a full time wage, yes thats harder.
And of course money you take out for a wage is a cost to the business, cannot be used to grow the business.