The tension and the knife

[SillyBill]

Long time reader on this forum, first time poster, go easy.

I have 3 businesses, one of which has 15 staff and where I now happen to spend the majority of my time working.

I have a scenario where I have a "compatibility" issue with one of the staff. This company was a purchase, running since the 80's and I inherited this particular person as part of the original staff. Old hand.

It is fair to say we just don't like one another and both would admit we are not happy with the situation. But there is not a competency issue, I am not concerned with the quantity or quality of the work. But I am concerned with our inability to "gel" and the tension it creates in a small office, for us and for others. I am at a crossroads as to what to do, I am an equal party to the situation so I can hardly point fingers, we have talked about the tension, numerous times, and within hours or days we both re-set. If it wasn't my business and just a job, simple, I'd walk as life is too short. It is though and I have a lot of cash at stake. He obviously can't and won't walk and I understand why. He is paid very well, decent benefits on top and knows his own job like the back of his hand as he has honed it over years ...yet wouldn't get a sniff anywhere else at anywhere near the package. Age discrimination, old dog, new tricks etc.

I don't feel like I can approach him (without potentially opening myself up to a tribunal) and ask him to just leave to put us out of our misery. Offer a package when there is no genuine redundancy situation and no grounds for dismissal for a work competency. I am not new to staff issues but I am a little lost as to how to move this one along. I am sure many will have worked in an office with tension between people and I am sure it is having a negative effect for the business so I want to sort it. Small business so we can't avoid one another unfortunately.

 

[JEREMY HAWKE]

Nothing you can do Bill It is what it is and if you did move him on you might end up with another bucket of S££t or a person so incompetent that you would wish that he came back

 

[Matthew J]

Long time reader on this forum, first time poster, go easy.

I have 3 businesses, one of which has 15 staff and where I now happen to spend the majority of my time working.

I have a scenario where I have a "compatibility" issue with one of the staff. This company was a purchase, running since the 80's and I inherited this particular person as part of the original staff. Old hand.

It is fair to say we just don't like one another and both would admit we are not happy with the situation. But there is not a competency issue, I am not concerned with the quantity or quality of the work. But I am concerned with our inability to "gel" and the tension it creates in a small office, for us and for others. I am at a crossroads as to what to do, I am an equal party to the situation so I can hardly point fingers, we have talked about the tension, numerous times, and within hours or days we both re-set. If it wasn't my business and just a job, simple, I'd walk as life is too short. It is though and I have a lot of cash at stake. He obviously can't and won't walk and I understand why. He is paid very well, decent benefits on top and knows his own job like the back of his hand as he has honed it over years ...yet wouldn't get a sniff anywhere else at anywhere near the package. Age discrimination, old dog, new tricks etc.

I don't feel like I can approach him (without potentially opening myself up to a tribunal) and ask him to just leave to put us out of our misery. Offer a package when there is no genuine redundancy situation and no grounds for dismissal for a work competency. I am not new to staff issues but I am a little lost as to how to move this one along. I am sure many will have worked in an office with tension between people and I am sure it is having a negative effect for the business so I want to sort it. Small business so we can't avoid one another unfortunately.

Is he good at his job?

 

[NickGrogan]

But there is not a competency issue, I am not concerned with the quantity or quality of the work.

knows his own job like the back of his hand as he has honed it over years

Sorry, I don't see the problem. You don't have to like everyone you work with, the whole office doesn't need to be friends.

He is by your own standards doing a good job and has done for years. Anyone you replace him with is going to be a substantial cost and risk. Can they do the job as well as or better than him, are they going to cause more issues than him, you simply don't know.

I'm trying to be nice, but perhaps you need to look at yourself and your attitude a bit more closely. Thinking of getting rid of someone who is doing a good job because you don't "gel" seems a bit immature.

I work with plenty of people that I don't "gel" with, because they are good at what they do. The fact that they love Jeremy Corbyn, or cats, or have been to EVERY Arsenal game since 1993 and always take a day off after is irrelevant.

What is your issue with this guy?

 

[Mr D]

If it comes down to it, separate the two of you.
Easier for you to have less contact than him. Office manager position over the staff perhaps? Not for him, for anyone else.

 

[gpietersz]

@NickGrogan is completely right. Getting rid of someone who is good at their job is the wrong solution.

Given the value of someone competent, you need to work out something better. I have come across coaches and consultants who might be able to help - maybe you need to look for one.

 

[SillyBill]

Sorry, I don't see the problem. You don't have to like everyone you work with, the whole office doesn't need to be friends.

He is by your own standards doing a good job and has done for years. Anyone you replace him with is going to be a substantial cost and risk. Can they do the job as well as or better than him, are they going to cause more issues than him, you simply don't know.

I'm trying to be nice, but perhaps you need to look at yourself and your attitude a bit more closely. Thinking of getting rid of someone who is doing a good job because you don't "gel" seems a bit immature.

I work with plenty of people that I don't "gel" with, because they are good at what they do. The fact that they love Jeremy Corbyn, or cats, or have been to EVERY Arsenal game since 1993 and always take a day off after is irrelevant.

What is your issue with this guy?

Thanks for your reply. No need to sugar coat it in terms of niceness, I accept it takes two to tango.

On your point in replacing, I don't see much risk, the job can be learned easily enough, takes a while to knock it down to a tee but then again so do most jobs. I do know this business like the back of my hand (the job of any SME owner IMO); I wouldn't suggest someone leaving if I thought the business couldn't cope.

The business is a good earner (11-12% net on a several million turnover) and priorities change. Personally, I could shut up shop tomorrow, rent the site out for 6 figures and keep another business as a side gig to keep me busy. So I am not working for just the money in summary (maybe once upon a time), keeping the staff in a job is more important to me than me swanning off though.
Perhaps with the last paragraph in mind it gives further context; that enjoying work is far more important to me at this stage than putting another £50k on net.

 

[NickGrogan]

Ok, you know the role much better than we do. So just go through the stages of dismissing him.

https://www.gov.uk/dismiss-staff/dismissals-on-capability-or-conduct-grounds

Get some HR advice first, but it's not that hard to get rid of someone, if they are causing issues.

Hopefully, the replacement will work out better.

 

[The Byre]

Perhaps with the last paragraph in mind it gives further context; that enjoying work is far more important to me at this stage than putting another £50k on net.

I like the philosophical attitude!

But then I bet the Old Crusty sees things differently. As Nick says, you do not have to love every member of staff and whatever is wrong, it's (by definition) always your fault!

Say what???

So who is running the show? You are! So guess whose fault it is! Trust me - if you are the boss, whatever goes wrong is your fault! I'd better explain -

At home, my wife is in charge. I may make all the important decisions like - well, there will be some, I don't know, er, well, what car I buy. You see! I knew that there was one! Yes! What car I drive!

At work, I am the boss. Boy, am I the boss! Unfortunately, I have no idea what half of the things that go on here are all about - everything is a profit island, so I don't really have to know, but hey! I'm the owner of the place and I get to play the boss! Kewl!

Why, only the other day I walked into accounts and asked elderly Mrs. M about something and she gave me one of her withering looks over the top of her glasses, as if she were talking to a retarded child with behavioral problems, but I put my foot down and looked right back. She explained what it was that I wanted to know and I listened attentively.

Unfortunately, I didn't understand a damn word she said, but I did my best and even asked what I thought were incisive questions. She took a sharp intake of breath and started all over again.

I legged it with the words "Well, jolly good and let me know if er . . ." By which time I was out of the door.

She has the only office that has a bed in it. It was put in there when she was ill and it seems that she has decided that it can stay.

But here's the thing - I have other things on my mind! I am launching a whole new project that will cost real money and may easily be more than we can even hope to chew. We are boot-strapping a project for many, many thousands that ought to cost umpteen millions! This takes up all my time, so as long as my wife keeps the trousers coming (I assume it is she who replenishes the monthly trouser supply!) and Mrs. M never legs it with the petty cash and everything else just seems to happen when and how it should (and pays for my looney project) then I leave people alone!

So stop bugging Old Crusty and find a new project.

You are the company owner and not the pencil monitor!

 

[Chris Ashdown]

As you took over the company he was employed in , will he be covered by tupe regulations, if so that may effect your considerations

 

[RobinBHM]

Hey sillybill -I think you should write a list of what actually it is that annoys you.
If it turns out to be his work procedures / processes -well you are the boss, change en to how you like it. If he just winds you up because he knows what buttons to press -stand back and weight up if the advantage of him getting his job done well albeit with some irritation is better than the hastle of training somebody new -the grass isnt always greener.

if he has been there long than you, is there an ego issue going on? -he resents you because you've taken over and he thinks he rules the roost because he knows his job backwards and thinks he is too important to get the boot. You on the other hand are annoyed because he wont always do what you say.

 

[SillyBill]

Hey sillybill -I think you should write a list of what actually it is that annoys you.
If it turns out to be his work procedures / processes -well you are the boss, change en to how you like it. If he just winds you up because he knows what buttons to press -stand back and weight up if the advantage of him getting his job done well albeit with some irritation is better than the hastle of training somebody new -the grass isnt always greener.

if he has been there long than you, is there an ego issue going on? -he resents you because you've taken over and he thinks he rules the roost because he knows his job backwards and thinks he is too important to get the boot. You on the other hand are annoyed because he wont always do what you say.

Hi Robin, I think you are bang on with the latter paragraph. Two stubborn egos is most probably what it distils down to. I also think I will approach the new year with a bit more vigour with respect to changing things up a bit and that will probably be a good result either way.

 

[Stas Lawicki]

Another vote for @NickGrogan

I've worked with, even hired, people I didn't like or had anything in common with. Everybody is different and perhaps you are focusing on the wrong things. The guy sounds dependable, knowledgeable, possibly trustworthy and also nearing retirement. Unless you want a tribunal that will cost you more than money (stress, excess work, time out of the business etc) then I would take them for a coffee/beer/ oat milk latte and gently talk about some of the problems. If it is as simple as differing personalities then put up with it. It sounds like you are letting this get to you... It would be great to get on with everybody but that isn't always realistic.

You never know, chatting about it might open up the reasons you both behave the way you do to each other...

It could be the perfect opportunity to get to know and like your best worker?!

Let us know what you do...