Dealing With Abusive Emails

[UKcentric]

I run an online community which is free to the majority of members, and members can pay an upgrade fee (much like this very site actually) if they choose.

I am happy to work for free for most members, and the site makes a profit from the paying customers, so all good.

But wow, does this kind of work ever attract some angry/aggressive/loony emails to the helpdesk!!

I really try to be extremely professional even when dealing with people who are using the free service (maybe one day they will upgrade). But these days it seems more and more emails are just somebody venting, perhaps not realising there's a real human at the other end who doesn't appreciate being bombarded with horrible emails every day.

They come in two kinds:

Kind 1. Great long tirade about how your service is worse than (insert competitor service), how the management (that's me!) are rubbish, how the site is going downhill rapidly, how we will be out of business in a year etc. Usually no specific complaint, just a general rant.

Kind 2. The one-liner, like:
- "You are con-artists and I'm going to be writing reviews of your site all over the Internet"
- "You're scamming me"
- "I'm reporting you to Trading Standards"
- Or just "**** off you bunch of ****s"

Believe me I am not scamming anyone but the Internet and my industry do have a slightly bad rep due to some bad businesses that have entered the market over the last five years or so.

Our customer charter means I do have to reply to all emails, even grossly abusive and harassing emails. I never ever respond aggressively but sometimes I do send back emails saying that me and my colleagues have a right to work in a non-abusive environment and therefore we won't be answering their query. This seems to wind people up even more.

What would you do to keep yourself sane, keep professional, and not wind up potential customers who are very angry and upset?

 

[Nick W]

Write a really comprehensive, easy to use FAQ covering all the gripes, misconceptions and prejudices people are displaying in email then politely point these people to that page.

Thanks for emailing me Mr Angry. I think I've covered your query here...

 

[silvermusic]

I suspect most could be covered by a half a dozen template emails you could knock together and adjust for specifics as or when needed. It will look like a personal reply but will only take you a fraction of the time. I do the same thing on eBay when dealing with the same old dumb questions over and over, makes life so much easier and stress free and it won't wind you up having to deal with.

 

[Raw Rob]

- "You are con-artists and I'm going to be writing reviews of your site all over the Internet"
- "You're scamming me"
- "I'm reporting you to Trading Standards"
- Or just "**** off you bunch of ****s"

With emails like these, if you're pretty certain that you are not scamming them and they don't have a valid complaint, I wouldn't bother replying.

(Can the customer charter be changed to say that we won't reply to abusive emails?)

 

[Websitehandyman]

Well your charter is wrong, you should say you will -

"answer all emails but abusive emails will may not receive a reply and may be reported to the proper authorities. The being the police, their isp or even them emplorer should they be using company email"

That will put all your problems to bed, point being some people are not worth your effort, don't pander to them or try to convince. Even if you do have success with that sort once it's only delaying your problem till the next time.

 

[iArtist]

Well your charter is wrong, you should say you will -

"answer all emails but abusive emails will may not receive a reply and may be reported to the proper authorities. The being the police, their isp or even them emplorer should they be using company email"

That will put all your problems to bed, point being some people are not worth your effort, don't pander to them or try to convince. Even if you do have success with that sort once it's only delaying your problem till the next time.

I agree with this, life is too short.

 

[cjd]

Publish them on your site.

 

[TheGeekestLink]

What would you do to keep yourself sane, keep professional, and not wind up potential customers who are very angry and upset?

I find having a damn good rant at someone about it works wonders for alleviating all that stress.

But be incredibly professional. Don't give your epic ranter a reason to call you out and don't ever take it personally. People are horrible (even worse than that) on the Internet and it's crucial that you behave utterly professionally and not take all their personal attacks to heart.

Most customers have an awful sense of entitlement and the angriest just love having a go, so don't be drawn into protracted conversations; get your points across, resolve all the issues you can.

It's often painful to do and many times you simply can't win, but a professional attitude and a very thick skin will work wonders.

Again, as has helpfully been said above, a stock reply or link to a well-worded FAQ can work wonders for both you and your stress levels

 

[gibby]

Simply its them not you.
Sadly some ppl are very stressed or agitated and they release this on anyone and everyone.

I used to run a community forum and group and had similar crap from a very small number of ppl. In the end I would just send a polite email thanking them for the feedback and that we had noted the comments. They liked to complain but were unwilling to come forward and help improve the group

I did find a lot of these ppl enjoyed the argument or were wanting attention.
One got so bad we called in the police and were told to simply stop responding to them and they should move their attention elsewhere.

Sadly there are a lot of unbalanced ppl out there but dont take it personally.

 

[Optegris]

Im pretty sure that sending abusive or threatening email is a breach of the telecommunications act and the sender can be prosecuted.

You might want to dig out a link to that section of the act and reply with a message you will take action if they persist.

I have a zero tolerance to this sort of thing and if I get abused I put the phone down or reply to say I will no longer deal with them. Thankfully it's rare that it happens.

 

[beasty]

I was sent this in a personal message some time ago and keep it as it makes me laugh so much.. I am not writing this from the grave...


BRACE BRACE BRACE

What the **** did you just ****ing say about me, you little *****? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I’m the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the **** out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my ****ing words. You think you can get away with saying that **** to me over the Internet? Think again, ****er. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You’re ****ing dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little ****. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your ****ing tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will **** fury all over you and you will drown in it. You’re ****ing dead, kiddo.

To confirm, I am not dead.. mwahahah

 

[pen2670]

I was sent this in a personal message some time ago and keep it as it makes me laugh so much.. I am not writing this from the grave...


BRACE BRACE BRACE

What the **** did you just ****ing say about me, you little *****? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I’m the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the **** out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my ****ing words. You think you can get away with saying that **** to me over the Internet? Think again, ****er. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You’re ****ing dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little ****. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your ****ing tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will **** fury all over you and you will drown in it. You’re ****ing dead, kiddo.

To confirm, I am not dead.. mwahahah

Too much Call of Duty?

 

[beasty]

Too much Call of Duty?

Certainly a little detached from reality..

What I found most worrying about this is not the numbnuts that wrote it but the fact that a 25 year old MAN can be so deluded, is this common?

I really think when his computer comes on it should only be allowed to say

GO OUTSIDE

It is funny to me, but talk about arrested development

I really do not want to become another certified kill or be killed in 700 ways with his bare hands so I will stop typing before spies check my I.P and I get snipered

ahahah comedy

 

[deadgoodundies]

I am trained in gorilla warfare

Oh god i've got images of Jane Goodall with a bandolier across her chest giving her best war cry in my head now!!!