Calling someone useless and saying your effing useless is the same thing, and counts as abuse.
With all due respect if you believe that, you are in my opinion sensitive. Does this count as abuse? Well no abuse or insult is intended. I just think you are overly sensitive, it's not necessarily a negative thing, it's just an observation.
Do me a favour please. Google the word "abuse", and look at the results that come up. It kinda of pulls apart your argument on what constitutes abuse. This for me comes down to life experience. If you had knowledge of working with victims of abuse, like I have, you would realise how silly it is comparing real abuse to someone being not very nice.
I don't care that you may call someone worse in a board room, when you're in the company of others, it's polite to give that person some curteousy and keep your personal opinions to yourself.
Erm I dont call someone worse. It's just my observations in real life.
This is a private members forum, and everyone agreed to the rules (which are easy to understand), if anyone breaks the rules then they get warned /infracted.
With all due respect this is utter nonsense. The rules are not easy to understand and hence this whole thread., If you think that then there is pointless you responding as you have totally misunderstood the nature of mine, and others complaints. I write t+c's for a living, and I tell you what - they are simply not fit for purpose.
If the majority of members can get along without abusing other members then I am sure the rest can if they tried.
Not real world I am afraid, peace on earth and all that.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MsJnxlXepsY
It's so good to see someone else share the view that it is so simple to sort this all out - it really is quite perplexing, trying to figure out why some people seem determined to make forum moderation as complex as string theory.
Agreed. There are some very convoluted answers above.
I suspect that the problem will be how to determine what constitutes abuse. Because for some the terms idiot / pillock and prat are abusive, whilst for others they are not. This is what I mean by things not being simple.
Absolutely. But when some mods think "
Calling someone useless and saying your effing useless is the same thing, and counts as abuse.
" it shows how difficult that will be for you.
Whilst it is clear that you know what offends you and what does not, which makes it simple for you to know whether a post aimed at you is offensive or not, it is not always clear to us.
Offence is in the eye of the offended so to speak. Some people are offended by anything. Some people go looking to be offended - just look at your average daily mail reader. This is one of my biggest bug bears about society. Everyone is desperate to score points by jumping on what people say, and being offended.
Also the thought that the use of words is what denotes abuse is really miles off the mark. 'eff off' can be totally un-offensive, while an unprovoked comment that usues no profanity, can be a terrible thing to post.
let me give you an example (and this is real world, not made up) 2 members disagreeing, #1 says to #2 'you are a very bitter man, why are you so angry?' #2 says 'why don't you go away and visit your son?' he was banned for life, his account wiped as a result. (not on this forum).
So your opinions at this point? a bloke was banned for telling somone to go visit his son? RIDICULOUS! grab your clubs and pitchforks, lets kill the mods.
Now let me explain that member #1 lost his son less than a year ago in tragic circumstances, and member #2 was completely aware of this.
So think about the actions her, and maybe you will get a glance of how difficult it is to moderate, and deal with things, when all the members know is 'he has been banned for life and I read the thread, there was nothing in it!
I am sorry James, but this is another convoluted answer. I understand the difficulty in being judge, but that is you [as in the mods] cross to bear. Nobody is arguing this should be an abuse free zone. This thread was prompted by one post. One post that was harsh, but it was truthful.
In fact if we are going to talk about what is considered abuse, then the "victim" of that post has called for the ban to be overturned. Surely if he isn't "offended" then that leaves only the mods that are offended. Is it really the place of the mods to be offended? Is a right for a mod to be offended by proxy on behalf of another?
--------------------------------------------
I have spent a few days away from these forums, and I have had time to think and reflect. These are JUST internet forums. Getting all wound up over them is pointless. The situations leading to this are for my mind pure melodrama.
Conclusions:
- Are some people rude? Yes
- Are some people abusive? Yes
- Should rudeness get an infraction? No
- Should abuse get an infraction? Yes, an instant ban.
- What is abuse? What does the man on the Clapham Omnibus say? Mods shouldn't substitute their view of what he says. It should be objectively approached.
- Are the rules fit for purpose? No.
- Do the mods do a hard job? Yes, absolutely. But you must get something out of it (even if it is that warm fuzzy feeling inside, otherwise why else would you do it?). When a mod abuses a member, no action appears to be taken (transparency please).
- Can SIFT but in an open system of yellow cards? Yes James they can. The arguments over libel are non existent. The t+c's just need to reflect this. Limit liability, and make the rules clear. As they are SIFT are far more likley to get sued by a paying member who gets banned.
