Why Do Some People Naturally Hold a Room Better Than Others?

[Keynote Speech]

We’ve been thinking about this recently from both a business and communication point of view.

You can have two people talking about the exact same topic, with similar experience and knowledge, yet one person completely holds the attention of the room while the other struggles to connect.

After hearing Derek Redmond speak once, what stuck with me afterwards wasn’t really the structure or slides; it was the honesty and storytelling.

In your experience, what actually makes someone engaging when speaking to a group or team?

 

[fisicx]

Timbre, pacing, gestures, presence, demeanour, dress, confidence, eye contact and the energy they generate.

 

[zenithpa]

For me, it’s usually authenticity more than presentation skills.


People connect far more with someone who feels genuine, speaks honestly and tells real stories or experiences, rather than someone who sounds overly polished or scripted.


The speakers you remember afterwards are normally the ones who make you feel something, not just the ones who deliver information well.

 

[HFE Signs]

There are courses on this kind of thing, if you research public speaking skills you'll find a lot of answers you're looking for

 

[Lucan Unlordly]

In your experience, what actually makes someone engaging when speaking to a group or team?

Doing their homework first' know your subject, 'know your audience', and being themselves.........

 

[Gecko001]

Doing their homework first' know your subject, 'know your audience', and being themselves.........

This what is important in my opinion. Knowing your subject, and not just because you learned it in college or just mugged on it the few weeks before, but through experience.

You can hold an audience by so-called presentation skills, but the purpose must be to get through to them enough for them to take away something from the talk. If you know your subject by your experience, then you will come across as someone who confident without really trying that much.

 

[JEREMY HAWKE]

One of the things that I can do in a room is talk absolute bollocks in my Devon accent and gain engagement in a room .I dont know why! its not something natural Its taken years of experience

I dont like words like hold or command its about reaching people and a major part of that is being yourself and most importantly being a good listener as well as a talker .

My late Dad was a good Cornish story teller and general comedian that made everyone laugh
I think I may have some of his skills although the modern jokes have to be more PC

 

[Mark T Jones]

One of the things that I can do in a room is talk absolute bollocks in my Devon accent and gain engagement in a room .I dont know why! its not something natural Its taken years of experience

I dont like words like hold or command its about reaching people and a major part of that is being yourself and most importantly being a good listener as well as a talker .

My late Dad was a good Cornish story teller and general comedian that made everyone laugh
I think I may have some of his skills although the modern jokes have to be more PC

Was your dad Jethro?

 

[JEREMY HAWKE]

Was your dad Jethro?

Your not far off he sounded exactly like him
Used to make everyone laugh and drive me nuts because I heard it all before

 

[Keynote Speech]

For me, it’s usually authenticity more than presentation skills.

People connect far more with someone who feels genuine, speaks honestly and tells real stories or experiences, rather than someone who sounds overly polished or scripted.

The speakers you remember afterwards are normally the ones who make you feel something, not just the ones who deliver information well.

Completely agree with that! The speakers who tend to stay with people are usually the ones who feel relatable rather than overly rehearsed.

Derek Redmond is a good example of that. It’s not really about polished delivery, it’s the honesty in the stories and experiences that people connect with afterwards.

 

[Keynote Speech]

Doing their homework first' know your subject, 'know your audience', and being themselves.........

“know your audience” is probably the biggest one there. You can usually tell quite quickly when someone is delivering the same talk regardless of who’s in the room. The best speakers seem to adapt naturally to the audience rather than just presenting information at them.

 

[ESYLee]

Interested in the views here. I generally speak with a commanding voice and feel I can hold the room quite well. But I've seen others who speak softly and quietly (almost like there's no confidence) and they absolutely hold the entire audience silent when they do.

Choice of words maybe and length of sentences maybe?

 

[fisicx]

Interested in the views here. I generally speak with a commanding voice….

That might not work for all. Some occasion may need a quieter or more empathic approach.

 

[JEREMY HAWKE]

Interested in the views here. I generally speak with a commanding voice and feel I can hold the room quite well. But I've seen others who speak softly and quietly (almost like there's no confidence) and they absolutely hold the entire audience silent when they do.

Choice of words maybe and length of sentences maybe?

Like him or loathe him

Kier Starmer has gone along way with a voice that is not really commanding or authoritive.
He has had a lot of success with the most powerful people in the world

 

[ESYLee]

Like him or loathe him

Kier Starmer has gone along way with a voice that is not really commanding or authoritive.
He has had a lot of success with the most powerful people in the world

Agree, he's done a lot without having the same voice as his US counterpart. I guess it's all down to the choice of words and experience behind those words.

 

[FreddyG]

Your not far off he sounded exactly like him
Used to make everyone laugh and drive me nuts because I heard it all before

And there you have the answer - or rather a series of answers.

1. He was rehearsed! Never try to give a speech, tell a joke, or engage an audience without spending a day rehearsing it!

2. People liked him. If you do not like someone, the last thing you are going to do is enjoy listening to them!

3. Jeremy's father was a fluent speaker. I guess that Jeremy's father could speak without going "Umm." or "Errr" - or even worse, "You know!" Every word was "placed" perfectly (just guessing!) after years of telling that story and learning to get every single word just right for the best comic effect!

4. Never read, not even notes! - oh, bloody hell! How many idiotic speeches have I had to sit through, where the speaker needed notes. We assume that you can read. What we want to hear is you talking to us! If you need to either read notes or even read the whole thing out loud, then you 1. Do not know your subject, and 2. cannot organise your thoughts into a few easily remembered topics.

 

[louis292]

We’ve been thinking about this recently from both a business and communication point of view.

You can have two people talking about the exact same topic, with similar experience and knowledge, yet one person completely holds the attention of the room while the other struggles to connect.

After hearing Derek Redmond speak once, what stuck with me afterwards wasn’t really the structure or slides; it was the honesty and storytelling.

In your experience, what actually makes someone engaging when speaking to a group or team?

Empathy and presence make the biggest difference. The speaker who holds the room usually isn't just delivering information; they are reading the audience's energy and adapting their tone and pacing in real time to keep people hooked.

 

[Keynote Speech]

Empathy and presence make the biggest difference. The speaker who holds the room usually isn't just delivering information; they are reading the audience's energy and adapting their tone and pacing in real time to keep people hooked.

I agree with that. Reading the room feels massively underrated. You can have all the knowledge in the world, but if someone can sense when people are losing interest and adapt naturally, it makes a huge difference. Dr Jo Salter talks in a similar way as well. Even with complex leadership topics, the delivery feels more like a conversation than someone simply presenting at people.

 

[Keynote Speech]

And there you have the answer - or rather a series of answers.

1. He was rehearsed! Never try to give a speech, tell a joke, or engage an audience without spending a day rehearsing it!

2. People liked him. If you do not like someone, the last thing you are going to do is enjoy listening to them!

3. Jeremy's father was a fluent speaker. I guess that Jeremy's father could speak without going "Umm." or "Errr" - or even worse, "You know!" Every word was "placed" perfectly (just guessing!) after years of telling that story and learning to get every single word just right for the best comic effect!

4. Never read, not even notes! - oh, bloody hell! How many idiotic speeches have I had to sit through, where the speaker needed notes. We assume that you can read. What we want to hear is you talking to us! If you need to either read notes or even read the whole thing out loud, then you 1. Do not know your subject, and 2. cannot organise your thoughts into a few easily remembered topics.

I think there’s a lot of truth in that, especially around people liking and trusting the person speaking. I’ve noticed audiences seem much more forgiving of imperfections if the speaker feels genuine.

Interesting point on notes as well. I’ve heard speakers like Mike Stevenson speak and it never really feels scripted, it feels more like a conversation where they know the subject inside out rather than trying to remember the next line. That probably makes a huge difference in how people connect with it.

 

[FreddyG]

Here is a masterclass in appearing to be speaking casually, when quite the opposite is happening!

- YouTube

Enjoy the videos and music that you love, upload original content and share it all with friends, family and the world on YouTube.

www.youtube.com

It is the brilliant educationalist Ken Robinson, who died about six years ago.

 

[Blood Lust]

We’ve been thinking about this recently from both a business and communication point of view.

You can have two people talking about the exact same topic, with similar experience and knowledge, yet one person completely holds the attention of the room while the other struggles to connect.

After hearing Derek Redmond speak once, what stuck with me afterwards wasn’t really the structure or slides; it was the honesty and storytelling.

In your experience, what actually makes someone engaging when speaking to a group or team?

Various factors allow people to capture a rooms attention.

With Elvis he captured attention from being a masculine looking man. With Elon Musk its his success and status as a billionaire. A particular Austrian artist did it by speaking forcefully. I`m pretty sure if Einstein entered a room people would sit and wait for him to speak. People who are idealised by others also find it happens, like movie stars.

In business legitimately holding a position of power and authority is the most common approach.

Threat + Status + Idealisation + Success + Intellect + Forcefulness

The reason why someone may struggle to capture a room goes beyond a lack of these. Professional jealousy and rivalry can result in dismissive attitudes. Having a difficult personality can result in others just letting them have the room, or conflict, or ignoring them.

Broadening the topic to charisma, people with something unusual about them are highly charismatic when it is perceived as increasing their personal value. People idealise and demonise others, people do it with rock stars and criminals all the time, and they do it all the time to everybody in their lives.

If this is recruitment for field sales find yourself a masculine man or very pretty female. Threat + Idealisation.

If this is for someone to speak at work, give them authority and power as manager, or have the top boss publicly anoint them with it by telling the others they better listen to them.