Business Networking - Getting Over the Fear

[Liamh121]

Hi all,
I am about to start going to business networking events and wondered if you had any tips on how to best approach new people and to appear approachable and knowledgeable? I always have a fear that people aren't going to take me seriously because I'm only 22.

Many thanks,

Liam

 

[businessfunding]

Firstly, don't worry about your age

Next, don't worry about nerves - that is normal

Most of all - don't sell!

'Hi, I'm Liam I do XYZ - tell me about your business'

Get the cards and follow up.

If the event requires a one minute pitch think it through and keep it simple - resist the temptation (I learned the hard way) to list everything you do just say one thing well.

 

[Liamh121]

Firstly, don't worry about your age

Next, don't worry about nerves - that is normal

Most of all - don't sell!

'Hi, I'm Liam I do XYZ - tell me about your business'

Get the cards and follow up.

If the event requires a one minute pitch think it through and keep it simple - resist the temptation (I learned the hard way) to list everything you do just say one thing well.

It's such a relief to hear that other people get scared too! I have been to a few before and most seemed to be incredibly confident, perhaps in some cases a little too confident. Point taken!

 

[businessfunding]

Sometimes the very confident are over-compensating for nerves.

sometimes they are just psychopaths.

 

[Henry Osadzinski]

Great advice - mind if I make this thread a sticky so that more people see it? It'd be great to hear from other people about how they get on when networking and what tips they have

 

[Young Recruit]

I used to get very nervous in any social situation where I had to meet new people. Typically I would turn up, stand or sit in a corner, mingle for a short time and only approach people who looked my age, eat some buffet, before leaving early.

What worked for me is couple of things. First I practiced physically feeling more confident, good posture, strong voice, etc.

Secondly, instead of hiding around the perimeters of the room, I would turn up early, introduce myself to the host and have a chat with them, and stand right in the center of the room whilst trying to greet with everyone who came in.

These things made me think that people would think I was very confident and this in turn gave me confidence.

My advice would be to just jump in at the deep end and you will realise it's not that bad.

JA

 

[GRDCredit]

Hope he wont mind me saying this but try and speak with member faevilangel http://www.ukbusinessforums.co.uk/forums/member.php?u=52381

He had similar problems when he started networking

 

[S-Marketing]

I used to get very nervous in any social situation where I had to meet new people. Typically I would turn up, stand or sit in a corner, mingle for a short time and only approach people who looked my age, eat some buffet, before leaving early.

What worked for me is couple of things. First I practiced physically feeling more confident, good posture, strong voice, etc.

Secondly, instead of hiding around the perimeters of the room, I would turn up early, introduce myself to the host and have a chat with them, and stand right in the center of the room whilst trying to greet with everyone who came in.

These things made me think that people would think I was very confident and this in turn gave me confidence.

My advice would be to just jump in at the deep end and you will realise it's not that bad.

JA

Great advice.

I once read somewhere that actually there is no discernible difference between being confident, and simply pretending you are confident. If you are able to pretend you are confident, and act accordingly, you are being confident. I have no idea if that is true, but it seemed relevant.

Just don't take it too far or you will become another 'networking event' drone.

I think most of you probably know my opinions on networking events, so I wont bore you again with my words of wisdom.

 

[Faevilangel]

Thanks for the nod Geoff....

I started networking face to face just over 2 years ago but hated it, I was shy and hated being in the room of 20+ strangers who constantly asked questions.

I posted on this forum and got some great advice, especially from GRD aka Geoff who travelled up from his place to meet me at my local networking and basically dragged me in so I could see how it would be for me.

I have now been doing it for 2 years+ and thoroughly enjoy it, it brings me in a large part of my income and I have made some brilliant friends but also some amazing clients and suppliers. I have spent in excess of £5k with people in the network as they supplied what I need at a price I wanted.

My advice is the same as 'Young Recruit', get stuck in and enjoy it, don't take it too seriously, be friendly and you never know what will come of it.

The networking has improved me as a person so much, I am more outgoing, a lot more confident and can tell people what I do and not want to crawl into the corner.

Networking is like sex, the first time is scary and might be painful but once you have done it, you enjoy it more and more and want to do it more often.

 

[GRDCredit]

T

Networking is like sex, the first time is scary and might be painful but once you have done it, you enjoy it more and more and want to do it more often.

Love it - I am going to use that!

 

[Liamh121]

Great advice - mind if I make this thread a sticky so that more people see it? It'd be great to hear from other people about how they get on when networking and what tips they have

That's fine, thanks!

 

[Faevilangel]

p.s. I was only 22 when I did my first networking so we have something in common Liam,

I am happy to talk via email or on the phone if you like, as I have been there and done it and highly recommend networking to build up the skills which any business person needs IMHO

 

[Donstu71]

In general though, do Networking groups allow people to the meetings who have not yet set up their business in order to get an insight into what goes on? Or are they purely for people already active?

Stu

 

[businessfunding]

In general though, do Networking groups allow people to the meetings who have not yet set up their business in order to get an insight into what goes on? Or are they purely for people already active?

Stu

Many groups are open; even those with exclusivity will probably allow you as a guest pre sign-up.

 

[Claire Dymond]

My business is a bit specialist to get work at networking so I go for the social as it's the only opportunity I get to mix with other small business people.

We pay just £6 per meeting and £50 per year and meet every other week. There is also a freebie at the local Basepoint Centre once a month but I have noticed that many businesses that attend networking are of the life coach/business advice/cosmetics you've never heard of type.

 

[Yorkshire&Online]

I think you have to go into the business networking arena without too much emphasis on trying to sell yourself and generate new business through it straight away.

Treat it more as a social event, somewhere to meet new people and chat about anything you like. The new business referals will then come naturally over time without constantly doing the hard selling pitch.

 

[traceyryland]

Like some others on here I treat networking as just that - building up my connections with other businesses - rather than an as opportunity to sell. I tend to find that leads come naturally when you're just yourself and clearly have confidence in what you're doing, although it doesn't happen overnight. I once had a colleague who set her self a target before any networking meeting - she had to come back with 3 'wins' of some sort. Sometimes it was just business cards from three useful contacts, sometimes it was promises of meetings or donations (she worked for a charity). I think some people can be that bold and can pull it off but definitely not me!

 

[traceyryland]

Like others on here I treat networking as just that – a way of expanding my connections and relationships with other businesses – rather than as a sales opportunity. I tend to find that the leads come gradually when people get to know me and have confidence in what I do. I once had a colleague who set herself a target for every networking meeting that she attended; she had to come away with three things. Sometimes it was just three business cards from useful contacts. Other times it was promises of meetings or a donation (she worked for a charity). I guess some people can be bold enough to pull that approach off but definitely not me!

 

[Paul_Rosser]

It's such a relief to hear that other people get scared too! I have been to a few before and most seemed to be incredibly confident, perhaps in some cases a little too confident. Point taken!

Is very normal and the more you do the easier it becomes, still happens to me and I've been doing them for years, a bit like stage fright though is all prior to the event and once I'm actually in there doing it they go away.

Just believe in yourself and don't make it a salespitch, more a way for people to tell you what they do and if there is a chance you could do some business together then follow it up after the event.

 

[GabbyGriffith]

I used to hate networking too. The hardest part is approaching groups that are already engaged in conversation. It sounds predatory but when you start off, approach anyone in the room that is by themselves. You'll find that most people are just as nervous as you and grateful for a smiling face.

Putting yourself in a confident frame of mind is a great way to encourage yourself to speak to people but be careful not to come on too strong. I once had a woman practically barge into a conversation I was having, shout her name and throw her cards at the group. It was all a bit much!

 

[Faddy]

I have this problem. I have a attended a few networking events in recent months and have one tonight. Still get the butterflies and 'stage fright', if you like.

It definitely is worse when you're young, people do assume you lack knowledge and struggle to take you seriously. I know fine well being only 18 but I grew up in a family were business has always been the main topic of conversation. I tend to announce myself by telling them about my previous business ventures as an early teen, which include a fairly large eBay operation and an online photograph restoration business.

Basically, my technique is to throw my self in and converse with as many people as I can in the time given. Confidently, but not overly cocksure.

Also, I agree that the best thing to do is turn up early and chat to the host, I will be doing just that in a couple of hours.

 

[Rachel_H]

Everyone gets nervous-just fake it till you make it. Stand up straight, shoulders back and speak slowly and clearly.
If you feel like you and what you have to say are important than chances are so will everyone else!

More Talk UK-Internet Telephony for smart business:
0161 375 0123

 

[Liamh121]

I think I've started to overcome the whole rejection fear - I'm no longer afraid of cold calling and I did an interview on Radio 1 yesterday! Will find a networking event and let you all know how I get on. Thanks for all of the tips and advice, I'm sure it'll help so many people on here!

 

[Faddy]

Cool, what was your interview about?

 

[Liamh121]

It was about my experiences of bullying and about an anti-bullying organisation I set up called Ditch the Label. We were in the Telegraph and Independent yesterday so it's really taking off! I was really nervous but the interview went really well. Fear is always irrational isn't it?

 

[Faddy]

It certainly is! That's brilliant, glad to hear you're doing so well and things have taken off for you!

 

[Liamh121]

Thank you so much, really means a lot. The past week or so have been so surreal, I feel like I'm in a bit of a daze! Now we need to start with the grant applications and corporate sponsors so that we can continue to grow at an even faster rate!

 

[Faddy]

Good luck with that! Just been flicking through your twitter, impressive growth in followers since a few weeks ago. Well done!

 

[maxine]

You may also be able to find networking events that vary in formality. My local chamber of commerce did informal chats in a hotel bar which was very different to others that did a round-the-room kind of format.

This may be an unpopular thing to say but I'd also encourage anyone networking for the first time to be prepared for an increased level of contact after the event and be ready for lots of invitations for a coffee and a chat! Don't feel like you have to say yes to everyone

If you get a chance to look up regular members online too that can also help you be prepared for who's who and what they do

Good luck

 

[Jpro]

Does anybody know of any business networking events in the London area that are coming up any time soon? I really want to start getting into the habit of networking face-to-face again and jumping in at the deep end seems like a good method for this.

 

[Faevilangel]

Does anybody know of any business networking events in the London area that are coming up any time soon? I really want to start getting into the habit of networking face-to-face again and jumping in at the deep end seems like a good method for this.

4Networking have 26 meets in London including Camden, Croydon and Twickenham.

They are every 2 weeks and run on alternate days. They are all breakfast meetings.

4N is £12 per meeting, and you can go to 3 meetings before purchasing a membership which gives you access to every 4N meet around the country.

There will be lots of business networking around London, so Googling "area business networking" will give you a good idea on places.

 

[Jpro]

4Networking have 26 meets in London including Camden, Croydon and Twickenham.

They are every 2 weeks and run on alternate days. They are all breakfast meetings.

4N is £12 per meeting, and you can go to 3 meetings before purchasing a membership which gives you access to every 4N meet around the country.

There will be lots of business networking around London, so Googling "area business networking" will give you a good idea on places.

I will definitely check them out and £12 per meeting is a lot cheaper than I expected, which is great! have you been on one of these events yourself?

Thank you for the advice, very much appreciated.

 

[Faevilangel]

I will definitely check them out and £12 per meeting is a lot cheaper than I expected, which is great! have you been on one of these events yourself?

Thank you for the advice, very much appreciated.

I must add, it's only £12 for the breakfast, the lunch and evening meetings are £15.

I have been a member of 4N for 2 years but not in London, but all the meetings run on the same script so are familiar where ever you are.

I do travel around the country so have done in excess of 15 different meetings (and over 100 actual meetings) and would highly recommend 4N as a place to try out networking as it's not for everyone but the flexibility of 4N means you can do meetings when you want, not when the network wants you.

 

[Jpro]

It sounds like a great opportunity to build quality networks, it would also most definitely help me get back into the habit of networking. I would prefer to pay £15 and go to an evening dinner as it would be much easier to fit around my schedule. Maybe one day we shall meet each other at one! Ha, thank you for the advice!

 

[Faevilangel]

It sounds like a great opportunity to build quality networks, it would also most definitely help me get back into the habit of networking. I would prefer to pay £15 and go to an evening dinner as it would be much easier to fit around my schedule. Maybe one day we shall meet each other at one! Ha, thank you for the advice!

No problem, I use 4N to get a breakfast before a client meeting so I am not travelling for no reason and means I can get in touch with local businesses in the area. Works well for me and it was a life saver in my early days, getting me out of the house and building confidence.

I have been in and around London with client meeting, and will be back there on regular trips so always a chance.

If you search for the meeting you want to go to, you will find the details for the area leader (on each meeting page) so you can chat to them beforehand so you know someone (if somewhat briefly) at the meeting, and they will be able to tell you of local businesses that use the meeting so you have an idea if a printer etc will be in attendace.

 

[HarveyIT]

I don't know whether it's because of the early mornings or not (though I admit it doesn't help), but i'm not keen on breakfast meetings. Although I have been to some. Have also been to evening ones as well, which I think I preferred. Most people have said these things anyway I believe, but:

DONT hard sell
DO give business cards out (everybody does anyway)
DO try to talk to people (not necessarily about business things)
DO NOT expect instant results (although you might get lucky)

I still get nervous at these things, but who doesn't???? In fact, last meeting I was at, I got the feeling that the girl sat next to me was feeling a bit nervous, but when she stood up to talk, she sounded fine. I also hate the 5min talks, I always start out with a rough idea what i'm going to say, but nerves can get the better of me. Have also found that humour can go a long way, and is defo a good idea. It can also help to relax you too.

 

[Oakleaf Studio UK]

I may get shot down in flames here but the thing that has put me off 4N meetings (and other similar ones) is the thought that people will be going there in truth to promote their own business and interests. They may give the appearance of being interested in your product or service but really they are there for themselves..

Networking is like sex, the first time is scary and might be painful but once you have done it, you enjoy it more and more and want to do it more often.

Interesting analogy. Can you also pick up diseases? :S

 

[formerguest]

Business Over Coffee (Belfast)


If anyone here lives in or near Belfast feel free to come to Business Over Coffee. Just bring yourself, your business cards, enough money for a cuppa and let's talk business over coffee!

We'll meet from 5:30 pm to 7:00 pm on Thursday 2nd May at:
Common Grounds Cafe
12-24 University Avenue
Belfast
BT7 1GY

This is intended to be a very relaxed and informal networking event and people can just drift in and out as suits.

 

[HarveyIT]

I may get shot down in flames here but the thing that has put me off 4N meetings (and other similar ones) is the thought that people will be going there in truth to promote their own business and interests. They may give the appearance of being interested in your product or service but really they are there for themselves..:S

Err.... no wish to appear rude, but I'd have thought this one was obvious. Ultimately, at the end of the day, of course everyone is there to promote their OWN business. Whether they are interested in other businesses and products is a different ball game. And yes, they may give the appearance of being interested, when in fact they are not. I hate to say this, but when it comes to 'looking out' for leads/work for other businesses within a group, it is perfectly possible that they could be giving any leads they come across to people OUTSIDE of the group, and no one would ever know. Oh, and there is the slight issue I guess that there will always be people that don't like each other within a group, and therefore won't pass any work at all. Have I missed anything out ??!!!

 

[Oakleaf Studio UK]

Err.... no wish to appear rude, but I'd have thought this one was obvious.

No I didn't take that as rude, unless of course you intended it to be?

Points taken. That's why I pursue other avenues for generating sales. The best being doing a good job for customers which, in turn, creates word of mouth interest which is far more valuable to me.