Mission Impossible -Fallout and the Blowback

[ANON48SK2]

Good evening,

as some posters may recall, I have recently survived disciplinary action taken against me after run in with a colleague at work. For those so inclined- please search for the threads entitled

/final-written-warning.383595/#post-2813585
/trade-unions.383818/#post-2815437



I'll cut straight to the point and do my best to avoid any waffle. As a result of the disciplinary action taken against me which I appealed but failed to overturned, management have decided to move me to another desk in the office. All went well, I took a week off at the end of January, went on holiday and then came back. I try to avoid smiling as I know it will cause her to react so I keep my head down and profile low and try to get on with work. We had a couple of team meetings where she struggled to keep a lid on how she felt about the situation. I knew about this but didn't react to it.

However she is very pally with everyone on that side of the office and now I find myself in working in the midst of other employees drop hints, references and indirect remarks about our pre xmas clash. Only yesterday did one of the managers who was involved in the disciplinary process a year ago actively quoted sentences from my disciplinary interview to other members of her team, of whom I sit next to when discussing the topic 'what do I like most about my job'.

I am getting a feeling, although not quantifiable , that I am being talked about without actually being talked about if that makes sense. I had spoken to my manager about this and he brushed it off saying I am being paranoid but then later that afternoon another manager made a comment about me 'hiding away' to another member of staff looking to give me some information relating to a customer. its possible he may not be fully aware of the situation but this is not something to shout about to the business.

Look I am not so sensitive that I can't take the odd dig and joke, let them have their fun but I am just worried that this will become something more entrenched and repetitive as time goes on. If this does continue to occur, I can see my stress levels rising. The easy solution is to leave and get another job. However I have been there nearly six years and do enjoy the work so I don't see why I should leave when all other aspects of my job are ok aside from this issue.

Its clear I have now, partially of my own doing- she has definitely had her part to play and isn't the innocent angel she tries to be, become the elephant in the office. Whether my colleagues like me or not I think is irrelevant. The fact is I am a permanent employee with a final written warning on my record and any disciplinary issues have to be addressed through the company's process so I am sticking to the advice given to me in the disciplinary. They can't get rid of me outright because they need one more act of gross misconduct to occur and they can kick me out. There would be no point going to an employment tribunal because of the evidence against me. so that would be my career with this company over.

I am on a final written warning until the end of the year and they have made it clear any repeated clashes will more than likely lead to dismissal given the body of evidence against me. I am deliberately avoiding her and keep the interaction/communications with her to the bare minimum but if she is going to get others to do her dirty work to get back at me, I am at a loss on how to play this out.

Any ideas ?

Thanks,

 

[Mr D]

Worth applying to other companies.

 

[Newchodge]

Get on with your job. Ignore anything else.

 

[obscure]

Without rehashing the old thread you let someone bait you into doing something wrong and got punished for it. Having "won" - and given that management don't seem likely to do anything about this person, you have two choices.
1. Stay
2. Go.

If you choose the former you have to find a way to live with the gossip/digs or you will again be allowing this person (through everyone who gossips) to control/harm you. The best way to do that is take it on the chine and make a joke of it. "I'm off to hide in my cave now if anyone needs me."

 

[ANON48SK2]

I only lashed out at her because I didn't sleep well the night before and cycled into work late, and was unable to control the adrenalin. I have now created a monster...let's see how long I last...

 

[soundengineeruk]

Not trying to repeat what I said last time, but you are in tight spot and the focus is on you. If let go you are gone.

It will be a case you going have to bite you bottom lip much harder than before, to get through this if you decide to stay there in the long run.

From what you said, it does seem like she is poking you for a reaction; not careful and don't deal with the frustration of this you effectively a ticking time bomb.

One thing I am struggling with here is why you being loyal to a company, who basically (I'm assuming here) have no problem showing you the door.

What is stopping you looking for another job?

Going down the tribunal route (I'm not HR/Legal expert) would probably mean you would have to go down the constructive dismissal route; unless they sack first. From what you have posted I'm assuming here you are falling under one or more of the the following

- disciplinary proceedings which are manifestly unreasonable
- harassing or bullying
- stress at work, that has not been probably addressed

Going to a tribunal for Constructive dismissal means the onus is on you to prove that your employer was in breach.

I would recommend keeping an diary/journal, keep track what is going on, even if you take it further or not. Capture incidents in as much detail (date, time, who was there, what was said); including how you are feeling at the time.

However, DO NOT store your diary/journal on your company computer, phone or tablet; or where it is easily accessible (like paper notebook).

From my experience I would recommend the following to storing diary/journal:

1. Store it on your own personal device (not company owned)
2. Ensure you have very strong password on it backed up to the cloud.
3. Don't use the company's wifi as you don't know who is sniffing.

I say the above; does depend on your company security policies; based on my own experience, that companies will do a lot to protect themselves, regardless if ethical or not. 9 times out 10 usually not.

 

[MBE2017]

FWIW, I would also start recording wherever possible, so if what should be private information is mentioned you have some proof to back you up. Whatever happens, maybe life is just too short and looking for a new position would be the best option, only you can decide.

 

[ANON48SK2]

Not trying to repeat what I said last time, but you are in tight spot and the focus is on you. If let go you are gone.

It will be a case you going have to bite you bottom lip much harder than before, to get through this if you decide to stay there in the long run.

From what you said, it does seem like she is poking you for a reaction; not careful and don't deal with the frustration of this you effectively a ticking time bomb.

One thing I am struggling with here is why you being loyal to a company, who basically (I'm assuming here) have no problem showing you the door.

What is stopping you looking for another job?

Going down the tribunal route (I'm not HR/Legal expert) would probably mean you would have to go down the constructive dismissal route; unless they sack first. From what you have posted I'm assuming here you are falling under one or more of the the following

- disciplinary proceedings which are manifestly unreasonable
- harassing or bullying
- stress at work, that has not been probably addressed

Going to a tribunal for Constructive dismissal means the onus is on you to prove that your employer was in breach.

I would recommend keeping an diary/journal, keep track what is going on, even if you take it further or not. Capture incidents in as much detail (date, time, who was there, what was said); including how you are feeling at the time.

However, DO NOT store your diary/journal on your company computer, phone or tablet; or where it is easily accessible (like paper notebook).

From my experience I would recommend the following to storing diary/journal:

1. Store it on your own personal device (not company owned)
2. Ensure you have very strong password on it backed up to the cloud.
3. Don't use the company's wifi as you don't know who is sniffing.

I say the above; does depend on your company security policies; based on my own experience, that companies will do a lot to protect themselves, regardless if ethical or not. 9 times out 10 usually not.

The only reason why I am showing loyalty to the company is because I genuinely like my job and have positive working relationships with everyone else on the team and the wider business. My annual performance reviews, aside from this issue, are generally good, not outstanding but I am meeting the brief set out to me. In addition I am very comfortable, possibly now bordering on complacency, working there as the work is local, I earn enough to cover my bills and have some left over and am generally content with that. In addition I've had to deal with the fallout of my brother's recent sectioning for schrizophrenia so its fair to say things are/have been rather intense for me. However i have had made an appointment to see a doctor at the end of the month as I think the collective impact of events both personally and professionally are affecting my own mental health.

The company is just covering their own backs, making sure disciplinary rules are followed to prevent a claim for unfair dismissal. In the disciplinary they mentioned they spoke to a wide range of people asking how I was an employee and the feedback was generally positive. The appeal manager mentioned that it seem that I am singling her out- well the reason for this goes back at least four years where I was subjected to her excessive and extreme behaviour in the office, which involved shouting and swearing where she couldn't cope with the stresses of the workload. He said I can't keep referring back to this because she has managed to curb these tendencies and our own manager says I should let it go, but I defy anyone trying to work directly next to someone unable to cope with their workload. It was like trying to sit an exam and being distracted by another student who was swearing and shouting because they didn't know the answer to an exam question...

Anyway I will speak to acas, see what they say. I possibly will mention this again to my manager but if he puts his head in the sand, then I have to go above him and go to HR. I spoke at length to the employee assistance line last night and they will call me back later today to give me more information. ...

alright so I'm off to work ...lets see how things go...

 

[Chris Ashdown]

After i got stung once by a salesman who promised the world and his company only supplied the Isle of dogs, I brought one of those cheap spy pens with a hidden video recorder built in , (about £30)

I then used this for all sales meetings and with any disputes later i would send the MD of the firm a copy of the video as proof of what was said

Not sure how it would be seen in law but time stamped so may help

 

[AnEmployee22]

This might sound a stupid piece of advice, or superfluous- but this female co-worker you have issues with.

Headphones? Block her out, block any idiot co-workers who believe her nonsense out if you can- noise cancelling ones are very useful. Or is that not feasible? She sounds a nasty piece of work though, one who is best avoided I think.

 

[ANON48SK2]

Well our manager wasn't in yesterday so you would've thought it would have been the perfect opportunity to indirectly get at me through gossiping. Instead the day passed peacefully with no explicit references to the pre Xmas clash. I think it's beginning to fade from people's mind and soon it will become old news. I am just going to keep a low profile keep my head down and get on with my work with a minimum of fuss. There is still a need to communicate with her for work purposes but I just have to play the line and keep it strictly professional. I'll think twice before interacting with her and if I can get what I need from somewhere else without going to her I will.

I do have earphones but i keep it in one ear as I still need to be aware of what's going on around me.

But yes she is a nasty piece of work of whom now i will be doing my utmost to avoid....

 

[AnEmployee22]

@ANON48SK2

Your approach sounds ideal in short-medium term I reckon. Low profile, minimum fuss- communicate for work purposes only and only if strictly necessary.

Earphones one ear, yep know that feeling- anything that helps though, pretty useful isn't it. Avoid where you can, as you seem to be planning.

I hope things work out for you.

 

[Mr D]

Well our manager wasn't in yesterday so you would've thought it would have been the perfect opportunity to indirectly get at me through gossiping. Instead the day passed peacefully with no explicit references to the pre Xmas clash. I think it's beginning to fade from people's mind and soon it will become old news. I am just going to keep a low profile keep my head down and get on with my work with a minimum of fuss. There is still a need to communicate with her for work purposes but I just have to play the line and keep it strictly professional. I'll think twice before interacting with her and if I can get what I need from somewhere else without going to her I will.

I do have earphones but i keep it in one ear as I still need to be aware of what's going on around me.

But yes she is a nasty piece of work of whom now i will be doing my utmost to avoid....

Sounds like things are going as well as can be expected.

 

[ANON48SK2]

maybe the strategy is ok in the medium term, but what about the long term ? Even when I was sat next to her, we did not communicate that much anyway. The fact we have a member of the team doing the same role and is based halfway up the country should prove I don't have to be in her ear or eyeshot to do my role. They've employed me on a permanent contract so its not something to just walk away from. As mentioned before, I will play the line with her, communicate for the purposes of work and that's it. I am never going to be bosom buddies with her. I'm sure the business knows communication could be compromised but as long as I keep it professional and don't lose my cool, I should be ok..

 

[Chris Ashdown]

Many of these sorts of troubles is because when the first instance of abuse in the widest sense of the word, either don't get reported or are just verbally complaints that can easily be ignored

The same goes for complaints to most companies for any reason, People just don't understand that verbal complaints seldom work where a written complain is taken much more seriously and helps both sides leaving a paper trail from start to finish, just like a forum where all the posts are a trail of answers

This is not against any action by anon but just a general observation

 

[ANON48SK2]

well in my case, I started off by asking her to stop swearing which she ignored. So I lost my temper with her and then went to HR with a written complaint . Unfortunately two wrongs don't make a right and I was reprimanded for losing my temper but the letter did have a major impact on her behaviour- it didn't eliminate completely but it curbed it sufficiently to be not a disturbance to my good self. Anyway I will start a new thread now...