How to write a sales letter, when you want to give something away?

[ToyWorldNW]

Ok, so we want the recipient of the letter to do something for us, but in return we want to provide everything required to do what we want and we want to pay them as well.

We're a toy/children's shop, and we've launched a "support your local school/nursery" scheme with a couple of local schools and nurseries. The way it works is that we've had leaflets printed which advertise our shop on one side (the same as our normal leaflets) and on the other advertise the "support your school scheme" - we have the leaflets printed and supply them to the school, the school distribute them to their pupils/parents along with the school newsletter - and then when a customer comes in to us with one of the leaflets we record how much they have spent and which school gave them the leaflet, and a 10% "commission" is paid to the school as a donation.

We also offer a straightforward 10% discount to the schools themselves, something we offer to all OFSTED registered groups.

We'd really like to extend this to other local schools, nurseries and playgroups etc. However I'm struggling with how best to word a letter to send to them with a copy of the leaflet, without it sounding spammy or like a scam of some kind.

Any advice greatly appreciated!

Thanks,

Marc

 

[ToyWorldNW]

As somebody who's good with words but awful at sales (I tend to waffle!), I've had a go and come up with this - please feel free to pull it to pieces, tell me how I should give up and look for a job stacking shelves etc. Haha

We want to give your school 10% of our takings!


The parents of your children spend hundreds of pounds every week at The Toy Barrow, St Helens leading independent children’s shop, and we’d like to share this with you to help fund the best possible education for the children of St Helens. Whether it’s a birthday gift toy, the latest best selling children’s book or even a few sweets as a treat after a great week at school, we’re the go-to place for families across the borough.


We are working with local schools, nurseries, playgroups and children’s groups just like you to spread the word about what we offer, and in return we are donating 10% of what is spent with us back to you tos spend on the children however you wish.


So, what’s the catch or the hidden cost? There isn’t one! We’ve produced the enclosed leaflet, and if you’d like to get involved we will supply you with enough of these for every child to take one home. Then it’s quite simple, the children’s parents or carers bring the leaflet with them when they shop with us, we record how much they spend and where they received the leaflet from (you!) and then we arrange for a donation to be made to you once per month for all of the sales generated.


Want to be a part of this fantastic fundraising initiative? Perfect, just give Marc at The Toy Barrow a call on 01744 732 796 or email ----- and we will get some leaflets arranged for you.


Don’t forget, we also offer 10% off all of our advertised prices for all OFSTED registered organisations, along with full invoicing facilities, and we’re always happy to have a chat about how we can help you to get the most out of your budget.


Looking forward to working with you and helping you to raise some much needed funds.

Kind Regards,

 

[The Byre]

the school distribute them to their pupils/parents along with the school newsletter

That's the bit that will probably not happen.

You can nearly always buy advertising in their end-of-year newsletter.

 

[ToyWorldNW]

It's happened successfully with the couple we've trialled it with. These were schools I already had contacts with though, so I didn't need to approach them with a letter.

I don't know whether it vary's with different local authorities, but primary schools in this area tend to send relevant leaflets home with their pupils regularly, perhaps every month to 6 weeks one will come home advertising some business or other, with the school benefiting if a particular promo code is used or similar.

 

[NickGrogan]

Don't send a letter, just call them. Faster, easier and you can tailor your response.

 

[hawts]

I'd try and get an appointment with the school's financial manager or bursar. It's all too easy to throw a letter in the bin so if you really want the action, send the letter prompting an appointment. Say you'll follow up with a call or pop in to the school to say hello. Worth trying to find email addresses as well as another follow up tool.

 

[Nochexman]

I'd try and get an appointment with the school's financial manager or bursar. It's all too easy to throw a letter in the bin so if you really want the action, send the letter prompting an appointment. Say you'll follow up with a call or pop in to the school to say hello. Worth trying to find email addresses as well as another follow up tool.

As a school governor and knowing the focus of many schools attention these days, I would be pretty cross if our 'financial manager' were taking an appointment on this basis. If you want their attention, you might start by asking to sponsor the next newsletter.

 

[hawts]

As a school governor and knowing the focus of many schools attention these days, I would be pretty cross if our 'financial manager' were taking an appointment on this basis. If you want their attention, you might start by asking to sponsor the next newsletter.

Good idea. Give something to them before asking something of them. The physics of reciprocation should take care of the rest.