How do you work from home with kids?!

[Coppock]

Hi, my husband and I work from home with kids - i've been doing it for 2 and a half years so i've had plenty of practice but my god - all i've had is screaming this morning so far....

I have a 2 year old (well almost 3) and a 5 month old,
neither of us seem to be able to work at the same time and its driving me mad......

any suggestions other than throwing them both in a nursery and running away?

Jen

 

[Coppock]

I swear they're doing synchronised screaming - one cries and so does the other for exactly the same amount of time............

I love them to bits but seriously - someone give me strength! At this rate i'll be grey before i'm 30!

 

[Coppock]

ahhhhhh peace..... thank the lord for Lilo & Stitch!

Seriously though - does anyone have any good advice from working at home with two kids?

Jen

 

[Zeno]

How about a rabbit hutch?

 

[TraceyAnn]

put them in part time private day care, claim for this with your wftc - that way you can concentrate fully on what you are supposed to be doing, they are being looked after by professionals and you can spend quality time with them rather than thinking of what you should be doing when you are all free.

 

[love2hire]

you can't work with kids that's if you want to do a productive days work...sorry but childcare is the only option.
I have an 18 month old and i can't do anything when he's here, always pulling the mouse or getting up to mischief!!!
He goes to a childminder 4 days a week and i get loads done, when he's here on a wednesday i can only work during his nap!!

Good luck

 

[Coppock]

lol, i guess you're right...
the eldest goes into nursery 2 and a half days, she will be starting nursery in Jan so will be in all mornings (was going to keep her going to the current one 2 afternoons a week)

I know she loves it, but its just sad to think she's growing up and I'm missing it....

I don't know what to do about our 5 month old, she's a darling but hates bottles so i'm still feeding her which is very unproductive!

They're both behaving now but thats because my partner is sat down occupying them both - so he's getting no work done... just feels like i'm sometimes doing the work of 2 because we can't both work...

hmmm.... maybe upping tia's nursery to 3 days a week and seeing about preparing jess to go in 1 or 2 days....

Thanks everyone,
Jen

 

[ukWebMistress]

Put CBeebies on for them, works for me

 

[richhobson]

put them in part time private day care, claim for this with your wftc - that way you can concentrate fully on what you are supposed to be doing, they are being looked after by professionals and you can spend quality time with them rather than thinking of what you should be doing when you are all free.

What percentage of the nursery can you claim then?

I have the same problem. I get a few hours in the morning stress free then after tantrums and usual stuff I'm in no fit state of mind for the afternoon.

 

[Gill]

Oh it is difficult I know and I do sympathise. I have seven children and have always worked, my children going to childcare from 6 months - I felt so awfully guilty and I used to work for £20 per week (after I had paid childcare, travel costs etc) and I still think that I made the right decision as I now have children with an excellent attitude to work, I have remained sane with all of my own teeth and hair!

It is a struggle and a juggle could you share - you work from 8;12 say, OH 1-5 lunch and evenings all together? Other than that I would recommend childcare (go along and see they aren't simply babysitters, the children genuinely enjoy time there, they learn excellent social skills even from a young age and they bring home marvellous treasures for you to display - my house is full of them!) perhaps part time to begin with - I think this is fairest - you can do what you need to get done and then you can be a less stressed and happy mum and be able to spend time being just that - not the business/wife/mum/cook/cleaner/etc, etc.

Your children are precious and time with them should be too.
Just my twopenneth, good luck
Gill

 

[Gill]

Oh and feeding - I breastfed all of mine too - Avent pump, start now and have some frozen for 'emergencies' - whilst children may dislike the change over to bottle it is simply a must (water, juice etc) and this is an easier transition - you can reclaim your life too! Ta daa!

 

[Coppock]

What percentage of the nursery can you claim then?

I have the same problem. I get a few hours in the morning stress free then after tantrums and usual stuff I'm in no fit state of mind for the afternoon.

I know that feeling - Andy (My OH) has just took the pair of them out - there's complete silence! But I can't get my head straight to concentrate!!!

Cbeebies used to work... I think its just the 5 month old is getting into things - she wants to do stuff she simply can't do yet (I remember pulling my hair out when Tia was that age!)

I think the WFTC pay for upto 70%? something like that - I just spoke with the nursery Tia goes too - they offer 10% off when you have 2 kids going as well, so that will be good!

We're upping Tia to 3 days per week - Mon, Wed & Fri, that way its more balanced and if she's making a din on a Tues and Thurs I can relax and make up for it the next day!

Jessi (5 month old) is going to probably start going in as well, just one morning and one afternoon to help...

I think the main trouble is that I'm supposed to be working more on getting work in rather than doing it all, but because only one of us seem to be able to work at a time I end up doing 90% of everything!

I feel bad sometimes that their lives are flashing before my eyes - but the alternative is that we both pack in and go out to work - which will be worse!

Thanks for everyones support!
Jen

 

[richhobson]

Just had a classic one.

I'm busy in the office room editing photo shoots, one of which needs to be uploaded today. I feel a prescence. The OH is hovering around. A quick conversation results in the fact that she's off for a bath and I'm baby sitting.

If I was away in an office then bath time would be at night.

People just don't realise that you're working.

 

[love2hire]

so coppock, what is it you do and whats your site (baby oriented?????)

My childminder on holiday till the 7th so its nice to spend quality time together, where to squeeze in the work:|

 

[4little1s]

Cbeebies and Thomas DVD does it for me. My working day seems to work by working very focussed for short period of times...but sometime just having a morning with the kids at nursery or a family member does the trick

 

[Fuzzy]

We take it in turns and when baby Fuzzy in bed I work evenings

 

[KidsBeeHappy]

You hit the nail on the head instantly. You can't both work at the same time, it doesn't work. You need to do shifts and be completely selfless in that you need to acknowledge that even if there is something that you desperately want to get on with, if what your partner is needing to do is a higher priority, you need to abandon work and take the childcare shift.

Personally, I find a bit of distance helps, if you're on childcare shift then go out for a walk, swim, park anything. Or if you're in the house, use that time to do the chores etc.

Also, you need to be able to ignore a ringing phone, particularly in that teatime-bedtime window.

Put the kids to bed and get productive in the evening time. 9-12midnight is one of the best times to work, no phones, no clients, no interuption. You can get 5 hours worth of work done in 3. But be fair to yourself see this as your scheduled work time, and take time off during the normal hours.

Once your clear in your head that your either working or with the kids, then it all becomes a lot clearer and you stopped getting stressed about the fact that neither bit is working.

You'll get there.

 

[Fuzzy]

Well said Sandra

 

[MISI_UK]

Your right it doesn't work but sometimes situations have to make it work.

I work at home with a 2 year old and 9 year old.
I dont currently have child care nor can I afford it at this stage! My husband works 14 hour day shifts so thats him pretty much out of the picture.

My business is very demanding at the moment which is great but is meaning lots of late nights/early mornings and juggling around in the day time.

I have nights were im in tears because im so tired trying to cram full time work around the kids. It isn't ideal but its had to be done.

I have help with childcare after christmas with I just keep thinking it isn't too long to wait.....

Some of these mums in business groups annoy me at times when they make it seem such an easy and enterprising thing to set up a business while your kids are at home. Its not easy its extremely tough and at the end of the day you and the kids do suffer for it. Ive only been going at it since christmas, it was a lot easier when my daughter smaller but now its a complete nightmare. Im really really looking forward to christmas
I know when they are both in childcare I will be able to manage my time better and have better quality time with my children.

So in short you cant, but sometimes you have to and I can completely understand! Its hard hard work!

 

[MrsPWN]

I agree that the only way to make it work is have a schedule between you and your DH, have set hours and try and have it so feeds are in your downtime so you can sit together for quality cuddles, my ex and I did this and it did work. If at all possible keep the kids out of your workspace completely so it feels more like work than home. Time the nursery time so that sometimes it is to allow you to work and sometimes you catch up on housework and sometimes time off.

Honestly, it takes some organisation and planning but once you are into the routine it should make life alot easier

 

[Coppock]

Just had a classic one.

I'm busy in the office room editing photo shoots, one of which needs to be uploaded today. I feel a prescence. The OH is hovering around. A quick conversation results in the fact that she's off for a bath and I'm baby sitting.

If I was away in an office then bath time would be at night.

People just don't realise that you're working.

Lol, I love it when my parents gate-crash... just because they work shifts etc they think they can turn up at 11 in the morn for the entire day...

 

[Coppock]

so coppock, what is it you do and whats your site (baby oriented?????)

My childminder on holiday till the 7th so its nice to spend quality time together, where to squeeze in the work:|

Unfortunately not baby-orientated otherwise I could class them as research!

Andy's the web designer, and I'm the jack-of-all-trades;
the graphic designer, the extra web designer, the administrator, the teacher ...
All good fun

Are you based near wrexham?

 

[Coppock]

Your right it doesn't work but sometimes situations have to make it work.

I work at home with a 2 year old and 9 year old.
I dont currently have child care nor can I afford it at this stage! My husband works 14 hour day shifts so thats him pretty much out of the picture.

My business is very demanding at the moment which is great but is meaning lots of late nights/early mornings and juggling around in the day time.

I have nights were im in tears because im so tired trying to cram full time work around the kids. It isn't ideal but its had to be done.

I have help with childcare after christmas with I just keep thinking it isn't too long to wait.....

Some of these mums in business groups annoy me at times when they make it seem such an easy and enterprising thing to set up a business while your kids are at home. Its not easy its extremely tough and at the end of the day you and the kids do suffer for it. Ive only been going at it since christmas, it was a lot easier when my daughter smaller but now its a complete nightmare. Im really really looking forward to christmas
I know when they are both in childcare I will be able to manage my time better and have better quality time with my children.

So in short you cant, but sometimes you have to and I can completely understand! Its hard hard work!

Hey - you must be being quite successful in your business to get to that point though!

You should look into getting help from the working family tax credits for the childcare though, they will pay upto 70% or something like that.

I set up when my eldest Tia was 6 months old, and it was a nightmare... its been a lot easier since i yelled at andy to quit his job and work with me though!

Its tough financially sometimes as all your eggs are in one basket, but at the same time we get a lot of family time together and we're all there for each other when we need it... its just getting that extra bit of "quality" time together

 

[Coppock]

You hit the nail on the head instantly. You can't both work at the same time, it doesn't work. You need to do shifts and be completely selfless in that you need to acknowledge that even if there is something that you desperately want to get on with, if what your partner is needing to do is a higher priority, you need to abandon work and take the childcare shift.

Personally, I find a bit of distance helps, if you're on childcare shift then go out for a walk, swim, park anything. Or if you're in the house, use that time to do the chores etc.

Also, you need to be able to ignore a ringing phone, particularly in that teatime-bedtime window.

Put the kids to bed and get productive in the evening time. 9-12midnight is one of the best times to work, no phones, no clients, no interuption. You can get 5 hours worth of work done in 3. But be fair to yourself see this as your scheduled work time, and take time off during the normal hours.

Once your clear in your head that your either working or with the kids, then it all becomes a lot clearer and you stopped getting stressed about the fact that neither bit is working.

You'll get there.

Lol, the ringing phone doesn't bother me - its the explaining to clients why we're elusive on the phone that does!

I used to work a lot in the evenings when our eldest was younger, but since having Jess i've been getting anemic on and off - which i think is why I simply can't work past 9 any more... but we're getting more on top of things this week.

Knowing Jessi is going to nursery just for a morning and afternoon next week is going to help a lot...

It seems a lifetime ago that I used to get up in the morning and knuckle down to work - it always seems to be trying to fit jobs in and around the kids!

oh... and GOD BLESS CBEEBIES - they helped me so much whilst running the business on my own... now we're also thankful for Hannah Montana, High School Musical, Mamma Mia, and Peppa Pig

 

[MISI_UK]

now we're also thankful for Hannah Montana, High School Musical, Mamma Mia, and Peppa Pig

The Wonderpets really do save the day for us!

 

[richhobson]

My eldest started nursery today. 9.30 am to 12 oclock. I got more done then than I have done in a long time!

 

[Coppock]

My eldest started nursery today. 9.30 am to 12 oclock. I got more done then than I have done in a long time!

Its horrible when they go and yet there's that secret feeling of warmth inside especially when you see how much work gets done

I'm going to have a shock when Jess goes next week... Tia's at home today (first time since monday) and I'm already dreading it... she's dragging the baby bouncer around the room... and yes, her 5 month old sister is sat in it..........

Jen

 

[cathdance]

Hi
I have a 3yr and 18mth old! i My 3 yr is now at pre-school and my other little one goes to a childminder at the same time.
I make a list of what needs to be done and what phone calls i need to make (normally impossible)i use my time well ( try too) and then in the morning i try and do activities with them.
This works for me, but not always.

Hope it works out.

Cath

 

[heidi]

Blimey, don't know how you do it! I'm a working Mum but spend 1 day working at home and 3 days in an office, but my son goes to nursery and has done since 6 months old.
I think its fairer on him to be at nursery beign stimulated and looked after whilst I'm working than being put in front of the TV whilst Mum tries to get some work done. Obviously, perfect world would be stay at home and devote all your time to them, but in this day and age that just isn't possible unfortunately.

I would opt for nursery/childcare if I were you - happy kids=happy parents, and you can concentrate on your work during the day and devote all your time to the girls when you're not working and they are there with you.

Good luck, its tough but do-able.