There is only one problem in the world...

mindatrisk

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(This is especially important for business people to understand)

There is only one problem in this world. One problem that unites every single human being. One problem from which every other problem arises…

We do not know how to be happy.

And, to make things worse, the things we think we need to do to make us happy actually lead to suffering, and, well, that kind of strings a little. Hence this world.

Our thinking is mistaken. We think ‘if things go my way then I will be happy’… ‘if I get what I want then I will be happy’… ‘if everyone treats me well then I will be happy’.

The problem here is that not one person in the history of humanity has ever had everything go their way, or even a large proportion. No-one has ever got everything they wanted, or even close, and no-one has ever had everyone treat them how they think they’d like to be treat. These options simply do not exist. So, to pip our dreams of happiness upon them is kind of stupid. It could almost be said that the reason we are not happy is because we are trying to be happy.

The problem with desiring things to be a certain way for us to be happy is that the seeming palace of fulfilled desires is riddled with booby traps. Think about it…

Let’s say you want something, but you can’t have it for whatever reason. What happens? You experience suffering… longing, frustration, upset, anger etc.

Let’s say you want something and you get it. What happens? You worry about it breaking or it being lost and, so, you are experiencing suffering, i.e. worry, anxiety, tension etc.

Let’s say you want something and you get it and then it is broken or lost. What happens? You feel angry about it breaking and, so, you are experiencing suffering, i.e. anger, resent etc.

Let’s say you want something and you get it but it doesn’t turn out to be as good as you’d hoped for. What happens? You feel frustrated about it and, so, you are experiencing suffering, i.e. frustration, disappointment etc.

Let’s say you want something and you get it and it isn’t lost or broken and it is as good as you’d hoped for. What happens? You lose interest and begin to want something else, and, so, the cycle of desire leading to suffering begins again.

In fact, the very best that can come from this is that we want something, we get it, it isn’t lost or broken, it is as special as we’d hoped for, and we don’t lose interest in it. What happens then? We become so attached to this amazing thing that, whether we ever lose it or not, we still fear it being lost, broken etc. and, so, we experiencing suffering, i.e. fear, worry, anxiety etc.

There is no way to win this game. Either way you turn, your desires can only lead to suffering. Our desires can lead to momentary pleasure, and, sometimes, that pleasure can be well extended, but there is no way to avoid the absolute truth that in-built into every desire is the inevitable experience of suffering.

So, what is the solution? Are we meant to never desire anything? How would we grow or develop? Isn’t it desire that drives us forward? Isn’t it desire that makes us accomplish things and become better people? Yes, it is. The point is not to not desire, but not to rest your happiness on fulfilling your desires. Desire what you wish, enjoy it for what it is, don’t attach yourself to it, don’t depend upon it for you to be happy, and then whatever becomes of that desire is okay. If it breaks, okay. If it is lost, okay. If you lose interest, okay. If it turns out to be rubbish, okay. If it turns out to be amazing, okay.

If you want lasting happiness then enjoy whatever is happening. It’s going to happen anyway, so you can either enjoy it or not enjoy it, and, since, enjoyment is more enjoyable than not enjoyment, it makes sense to just enjoy whatever. There are many techniques to enjoy whatever is happening to us. One simple technique is to compare our situation to that of others. For example, you might be stuck in terrible traffic, but at least you’re not in a war zone or starving to death somewhere. You can also find things to be grateful for in your situation. For example, you are stuck in traffic but thankfully you have some awesome tunes to put on, or, you have some free time to do some work, or whatever. It is not the world that restricts or harms our experience of reality, it is our attitude… the way we choose to see things. Once we realise that we have the power and freedom to see the world in any which way we desire then we can begin to experience whatever life it is we wish to experience, and, i’m guessing, that is a happy one.

Now, think about all of this this carefully, because, Western capitalist society is built upon a lifestyle of desiring things and then working to get them, and yet, as we can see from the above, that whole lifestyle can only lead to suffering, with the very best we can hope for being that we experience some pleasure before the suffering comes. That is the very foundation of our society… and it shows! Look at us! Everything is a mess. We are a mess. No wonder that people are driven insane, no wonder that people are desperate, no wonder that so many people are depressed… the very thing that is supposed to lead us to happiness is actually the very thing that leads to suffering… ****! And this is the very root of all our problems. Please, analyse this. Look at your lifestyle. Look at what you want right now and how it causes you suffering. Look at all the things you’ve wanted and gotten, and how that has brought you suffering.

This is the key to everything… everything. The future of our planet depends utterly and totally on our understanding this. This cannot be understated… it can be misunderstood, it can be denied, it can be ridiculed, it can be unappreciated, but it remains our only salvation.

Analyse this. Critique it. Think deeply about how this relates to your life and to our world. Think about how this relates to war, to poverty, to the economy, to theft, to murder, to rape, to greed, to pollution… think carefully about every major and minor problem in the world and you will see that it comes back to this.
 
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Matt1959

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sorry Jeff, i think I should re phrase my post above! What I'm trying to say is that there are people out there who seem to spend their whole time analysing whether they are happy or not to the point where they then start including everyone else and pronouncing how happy others are supposed to be. Its this group of people who analyse to death that cannot find happiness IMO...
 
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I was most happiest when i was a lager lout fag head.

For some reason it is hard to think about how things could be worse. I was having a crap day last week and remember looking at a broom and thinking about the guy who had sold it to me last year, he got ran over and died in a hit and run. Didn't improve my mood.

I think i have managed to overcome emotion formed from materialistic desire, there was a time i couldn't wait for something to be delivered or to buy something as soon as it came out, now i am not in so much of a rush because i preempt how bored i will be of it in 5 minutes.

The happiest people on earth most probably reside half naked in the rainforest.

The future of the planet is pretty much destined to failure, even if we don't destroy it the giver of life will boil it in a few thousand million years :D
 
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There is no such thing as happiness.

I believe that what people describe as happiness is merely a transition from a state of anxiety to one of contentment untill the next bout of slings and arrows decends

Most men lead lives of quiet desperation interspersed with periods of maniac depressiveness.
 
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mindatrisk

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and strangely enough, the ones who bang on most about being happy are the unhappiest in my experience;)

I think that makes sense, though. People who are unhappy are more likely to investigate how to be happy than those who are happy / happy enough / in denial / never even thought about it. I used to feel very unhappy, and then I started to investigate and acquire understanding and now, whilst I wouldn't say I beam with delight or anything, I am somewhere on the happiness gradient, but most importantly with the map to go further.
 
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mindatrisk

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sorry Jeff, i think I should re phrase my post above! What I'm trying to say is that there are people out there who seem to spend their whole time analysing whether they are happy or not to the point where they then start including everyone else and pronouncing how happy others are supposed to be. Its this group of people who analyse to death that cannot find happiness IMO...

Ignorance is bliss? I think there are some people who are naturally happy, but that's because they adhere to the principles that lead to happiness, whether consciously or not. For those who are unhappy I think it's wise to understand why and what they need to do to be happy. I'm not sure that I agree that it is the pursuit of happiness that is leading to unhappiness, rather the wrong pursuit of happiness that is leading to unhappiness.
 
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mindatrisk

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I was most happiest when i was a lager lout fag head.

For some reason it is hard to think about how things could be worse. I was having a crap day last week and remember looking at a broom and thinking about the guy who had sold it to me last year, he got ran over and died in a hit and run. Didn't improve my mood.

I think i have managed to overcome emotion formed from materialistic desire, there was a time i couldn't wait for something to be delivered or to buy something as soon as it came out, now i am not in so much of a rush because i preempt how bored i will be of it in 5 minutes.

The happiest people on earth most probably reside half naked in the rainforest.

The future of the planet is pretty much destined to failure, even if we don't destroy it the giver of life will boil it in a few thousand million years :D

Interesting, honest perspective. Thanks.
 
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mindatrisk

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DOOM
DOOM
DOOM

I am sure we will all die

It's not like my line of inquiry is gate-crashing a utopia... there are very real problems that require solutions. Maybe the problem doesn't apply to you or maybe you don't care, but given how many people are on antidepressants nowadays, I think it's an important subject to discuss.
 
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mindatrisk

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There is no such thing as happiness.

I believe that what people describe as happiness is merely a transition from a state of anxiety to one of contentment untill the next bout of slings and arrows decends

Most men lead lives of quiet desperation interspersed with periods of maniac depressiveness.

Indeed, but I think what you are describing is the mistaken view that pleasure is happiness. Most of us tend to lead our lives attempting to be happy by stringing together moments of pleasure... that is what western capitalism is built upon. The problem is that pleasure, or even sustained pleasure, is not happiness, and, actually, leads to suffering, as I outlined above. I do think happiness exists, though, but it is rare.
 
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mindatrisk

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I think that one becomes really happy when he or she doesn't blame anything or anyone in one's troubles, tries to do one's best in the life and has a PEACE in the soul. But the happiness idea is different for a sheep and a wolf.

I like your perspective. Self-responsibility, honest effort and peace of mind / soul all seem like good ingredients. I suppose the question is how to achieve these states?
 
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mindatrisk

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It is a thorough description of a problem. But I am interested in what you propose as a solution. I accept, personally, that linking happiness to material outcomes, or even outcomes, is a bit of a cul-de-sac. So do many others.

What are you proposing?

From my experience, happiness arises from peace of mind, i.e. at a basic level, I cannot be both happy and angry, agitated, upset etc. When I have peace of mind I can enjoy life moment to moment for what it is... I actually think our natural state of mind is happiness, so happiness is more about returning to something than achieving something.

Anyway, the question then moves to 'how do I attain peace of mind?' and that is a big question, but the fundamental answer is to develop a more compassionate, kind mindset. For example, if we understand that those who treat us badly are doing so because deep down (or superficially) they are suffering then we can re-focus on helping them rather than resisting them. That way we don't engage in hostile interactions and that way we don't end up with agitated, angry minds internally ranting at X, Y and Z.

That's a brief outline that definitely deserves much more discussion but i'll leave that to others to initiate less I bore you with more essays. :)
 
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mindatrisk

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The only thing i'd add is this... If your happiness depends upon your state of mind then you are in control. If you happiness depends upon circumstances or others then you have no control. Our aim must be to create a mindset that can experience anything and remain un-ruffled. Then true, lasting happiness is ours.
 
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I saw a nun sitting on shouting into an iPhone today and odd site indeed.

Had some nutella cheesecake, WOW

Swam in the sea

thought i was ill then realised i had just walked to the store in 35c heat wearing a jumper

Called THE MAN by boss of a large US company...

As Ice Cube would say, today was a good day
 
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mindatrisk

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very arrogant to decide whether other people are happy or not, many people have different criterias for what makes them happy IMO

The thing is, many people have different ideas about how the Earth was formed... but the truth is the truth. If you have a different idea about what happiness is and how to attain it then that is perfectly fine. The proof will be in the pudding, and I guarantee that - should you investigate life honestly - that what I have said in my opening post will be demonstrated as true time after time and for every single human being. I don't think its arrogant to point out the truth. A scientist who explains how electricity works isn't arrogant just because someone else thinks electricity comes from Zeus or whatever. If there are things you think are wrong in what i've said then please do argue the points. :)
 
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The thing is, many people have different ideas about how the Earth was formed... but the truth is the truth. If you have a different idea about what happiness is and how to attain it then that is perfectly fine. The proof will be in the pudding, and I guarantee that - should you investigate life honestly - that what I have said in my opening post will be demonstrated as true time after time and for every single human being. I don't think its arrogant to point out the truth. A scientist who explains how electricity works isn't arrogant just because someone else thinks electricity comes from Zeus or whatever. If there are things you think are wrong in what i've said then please do argue the points. :)

Almost every sentence in your original post is clearly wrong, and you have contradicted yourself in later posts. Hard to argue the points when you don't really have any.

There is only one problem in this world. - no there are many problems in the world, disease, food, water, shelter, etc, etc.

One problem that unites every single human being - Nothing has united the human race ever.

One problem from which every other problem arises…We do not know how to be happy.

Some people are happy some are not. Problems don't only arise from unhappiness - my cousins stroke, brain damage and blindness wasn't caused by him being unhappy, and it's insulting to suggest that it was.

And that's just the first few sentences.
 
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Some people are happy some are not. Problems don't only arise from unhappiness - my cousins stroke, brain damage and blindness wasn't caused by him being unhappy, and it's insulting to suggest that it was.

That would be very much up for debate as ones emotional well being /life style has a profound effect on one's physical health.

I.E obesity is now the No 1 medical problem in the UK.
 
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That would be very much up for debate as ones emotional well being /life style has a profound effect on one's physical health.

I.E obesity is now the No 1 medical problem in the UK.

Which relates how? Obesity isn't caused by lack of happiness - it's caused by eating too much and not moving around enough. If the cause was unhappiness you'd see lots of fat people waddling around war zones, etc.
 
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mindatrisk

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Almost every sentence in your original post is clearly wrong, and you have contradicted yourself in later posts. Hard to argue the points when you don't really have any.

First of all, I LOVE a good discussion, so if almost every sentence in my opening post is clearly wrong then I would more than welcome a thorough analysis of it... or an analysis to whatever degree you feel necessary. That especially applies to contradictions... if i've made them, point them out for all to see. :) I love to learn, and given the extent to which I have studied this subject, I am more than curious to be challenged so strongly. If you can teach me / correct me then please do.

There is only one problem in this world. - no there are many problems in the world, disease, food, water, shelter, etc, etc.

This misunderstanding is my fault. What I should have said is that there is one core problem from which all other problems arise. I'll also admit that it is not obvious how poverty arises from people not knowing how to be happy. I'll happily explain if you want me to.

One problem that unites every single human being - Nothing has united the human race ever.

What I mean by 'unite' is that we all share the problem, not that we will all come together to solve it. I think all human beings would agree that they want to be happy.

Some people are happy some are not. Problems don't only arise from unhappiness - my cousins stroke, brain damage and blindness wasn't caused by him being unhappy, and it's insulting to suggest that it was.

Some people are happy, some people are not, just as some people are successful, some people are not. What I contend is that there are reasons for success / lack of success just as there are reason for happiness / unhappiness.

I don't want to go too deep into this without being prompted by you, as it is a deep discussion that demands thorough exploration. I'll let your points and questions direct where this goes. Thanks for your reply. :)
 
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Which relates how? Obesity isn't caused by lack of happiness - it's caused by eating too much and not moving around enough. If the cause was unhappiness you'd see lots of fat people waddling around war zones, etc.

I think you will find that nearly all eating disorders have a psychological basis probably in the case of overeating similar to drug addiction but certainly based on one form of unhappiness or another.IMHO

P.S only people who are not sure if they are happy would say they are.;)
 
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If your first post you wrote;

We do not know how to be happy.

Later you wrote

I think there are some people who are naturally happy
I do think happiness exists, though, but it is rare.
I actually think our natural state of mind is happiness
Some people are happy

All contradicting your main point.

Then you wrote

And, to make things worse, the things we think we need to do to make us happy actually lead to suffering

Followed by

I'm not sure that I agree that it is the pursuit of happiness that is leading to unhappiness.

You write like someone who has stumbled across Seneca and think that it's a great revelation, but want it to be your "idea"
 
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I think you will find that nearly all eating disorders have a psychological basis probably in the case of overeating similar to drug addiction but certainly based on one form of unhappiness or another.IMHO

So why are the unhappy people I see in Syria/Iraq/Libya almost all thin then? Surely they are suffering quite high levels of unhappiness. Shouldn't they be fat, following your logic?
 
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Well I suppose on 2 quid a day they may not be able to buy enough food to feed their families let alone become obese.;)

Except that they can afford to travel across to Libya in the first place, and pay the people smugglers anything from £1000-4000 each to get across to Europe suggests they may well have a lot more than £2 per day. Plus they would have been unhappy before travelling to Libya - hence the reason for going in the first place, and so would have started off obese.
 
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mindatrisk

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We do not know how to be happy.

Later you wrote

I think there are some people who are naturally happy
I do think happiness exists, though, but it is rare.
I actually think our natural state of mind is happiness
Some people are happy

All contradicting your main point.

I'm not sure that this is a contradiction. Some people are happy, but i'm not sure whether they know why they are happy. Just as some people are successful without knowing why they are successful - they just have certain qualities and success / happiness comes naturally.

Also, keep in mind that when writing a piece for discussion there are certain techniques used to prompt / provoke discussion. One such technique is sweeping statements, which serve as an easy opening. This is especially important when a subject is quite technical. That's important, because I started this thread to begin a discussion that could explore points through questions and challenges being made, hence my appreciation for your presence here.

Then you wrote

And, to make things worse, the things we think we need to do to make us happy actually lead to suffering

Followed by

I'm not sure that I agree that it is the pursuit of happiness that is leading to unhappiness.


In fairness to me, you have taken my statements out of context. The second statement:

I'm not sure that I agree that it is the pursuit of happiness that is leading to unhappiness.

Was a response to the idea that pursuing happiness gets in the way of 'just being happy'. I then made the point that if someone is unhappy then it is not the pursuit of happiness that is leading to their unhappiness. This is a very different point to my original statement that how we pursue happiness is leading us to suffering. I don't see any contradictions if the full context is taken into account.
 
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