Do you admit liability by apologizing?

[jimster_s]

hi
this is a personal matter and nothing to do with my business so i hope i can post this here.

This is a long story but ill try and cut it short.

I erected a new fence between our garden and our next door neighbours garden. The neighbour didnt like the fence once it was up. The old fence was 25 year old chicken wire, the new fence was a nice 6foor panel fence. She got out her deeds and it turns out her garden is 3 foot short at the bottom.

I replaced the fence like for like in the same position. Her husband errected the original one 25 years ago.

The bottom part of land was actually claimed by us by possessory title before we bought the house. The boundaries were inspected and they were happy with everything.

She claimed we 'stole' the 3 foot and got free solicitors through her house insurance. She insisted that we move our fence 3 foot. We didnt get any free legal cover with ours and we certainly didnt steel and of her garden. This is a long story and has been going on over a year but ill leave out the details.

Luckily we had before and after pictures from all different angles which clearly showed we didnt take any of her land at all. We sent this off to her solicitor and a while later we got a letter back saying the neighbour wouldnt pursue the case any further if we issued a letter of apology and we stated we would allow her access through our garden. She does need access through our garden to take her bins in and out and we have never denied her access.

There is a bit more to it, but basically if i apologise am i admitting liability and can they then take this further because i have actually apologised?

I have been advised by somebody to say; "Im sorry for the way Ms Name feels she has been treated." This is an apology however im only apologising for how she feels she has been treated and i havent actually said ive treated her wrong.

Or should i just ignore the solicitors letter and not give her the apology?


Any advice?

 

[Kernowman]

An apology is not by any means any admission to liability, unless you admit to liability in your apology!

I have been advised by somebody to say; "Im sorry for the way Ms Name feels she has been treated." This is an apology however im only apologising for how she feels she has been treated and i havent actually said ive treated her wrong.

That also means you can battle each other to the death through litigation, but still be polite and civil towards each other when you meet That's what after all solicitors do all day every day between themselves without coming to blows over it. That's what they tell us anyway LOL

 

[KidsBeeHappy]

Worked for John Prescott;

"I am sorry if you've taken offense........"

 

[maxh]

What a gigantic waste of time and effort. Come to a reasonable agreement with them, talk to them on a normal level and if she doesn't agree, mover your fence.

It's 3 foot, i'm sure there's more important things you could be spending your time on?

 

[jimster_s]

thanks for advice.
yes its a complete waste of time and money.
the woman has always insisted that she wanted the fence moved. if she could have made us move it she would have. her solicitor always said she wanted it moving and not compensation.

after we explained the case and provided photo proof that we have not taken what was claimed, the case has been dropped and i have just been asked for an apology.

i just wasnt sure if the apology was a sneaky way of getting me to admit ive dont something wrong.

 

[maxh]

thanks for advice.
yes its a complete waste of time and money.
the woman has always insisted that she wanted the fence moved. if she could have made us move it she would have. her solicitor always said she wanted it moving and not compensation.

after we explained the case and provided photo proof that we have not taken what was claimed, the case has been dropped and i have just been asked for an apology.

i just wasnt sure if the apology was a sneaky way of getting me to admit ive dont something wrong.

Hmm, if they've dropped it then maybe you should be asking for an apology for wasting your time!

Or just ignore it. OR Apologise in person, no witnesses.

 

[jimster_s]

hi, i do agree she should be saying sorry to me for wasting my time.
its a complete joke even her family have told her that we havent taken any land.

ive tried to speak to her however she refuses to speak to us and still wants the letter from the solicitor. ive had a few reminders from her solicitor asking for this apology and letter of access so i was thinking something fishy might be going on.

im tempted to just ignore it however i dont want it to be dragged up again if a simple apology will make it go away.

i was going to put this:

"As per the letter dated......... requesting a apology, here is our return letter. We are truly sorry for the way Ms....... feels she has been treated. It has never been our intention to upset her and still believe we have been reasonable neighbours and placed the fence in the same position.

We have never restricted Ms ..... from the access of the path through our garden and side of the house and will continue to allow Ms....... to use this pathway for her bins. In fact we have recently upgraded the access and pathway to make it a nicer and safer walkway for us both to use.

Due to two attempted break ins into our house through our french doors at the rear of our house we would like to kindly ask Ms..... to keep the gate closed and bolted when not in use to keep the rear of both our houses secure.

We are hoping with this letter we can put all this behind us and both enjoy living on ....Street as neighbours."

 

[LawHound]

I cannot see why you are being asked to apologise, she has wasted her time and insurance money and been proven to be in the wrong. If she is elderly I would do this face to face and confirm there is none and never has been any issue in her using the garden to put the bin out. It sounds more emotional and about the removal of a fence put up by her husband so it now looks different rather than something any lawyer should have encouraged her to proceed with. She is probably, on some level, quite embarrassed by this now.

 

[maxh]

She's probably really bored and this is providing her some level of entertainment.

Offer to play cluedo with her or something..

 

[Kernowman]

ive tried to speak to her however she refuses to speak to us and still wants the letter from the solicitor. ive had a few reminders from her solicitor asking for this apology and letter of access so i was thinking something fishy might be going on.

im tempted to just ignore it however i dont want it to be dragged up again if a simple apology will make it go away.

i was going to put this:

"As per the letter dated......... requesting a apology, here is our return letter. We are truly sorry for the way Ms....... feels she has been treated. It has never been our intention to upset her and still believe we have been reasonable neighbours and placed the fence in the same position.

We have never restricted Ms ..... from the access of the path through our garden and side of the house and will continue to allow Ms....... to use this pathway for her bins. In fact we have recently upgraded the access and pathway to make it a nicer and safer walkway for us both to use.

Due to two attempted break ins into our house through our french doors at the rear of our house we would like to kindly ask Ms..... to keep the gate closed and bolted when not in use to keep the rear of both our houses secure.

We are hoping with this letter we can put all this behind us and both enjoy living on ....Street as neighbours."

Yep, do it and get closure on it.

Solicitors rarely have hidden agendas and if they say that's what their client requires from you then accept it at face value.

 

[jimster_s]

its more a case of that she cant make us move the fence so is clutching at any last straw to have some sort of win. i see it that she thinks that if she can get an apology and a letter stating she can have access at least she has got something out of it.

i have just re-read the letter. it says that the neighbour is willing to withdraw the case if we agree to give her a letter of apology and written access including keeping the gate unlocked and unobstructed.

ive just had an email from the solicitor stating that if we dont produce the letter they will be forced to take the clients further instructions and possibly persue the matter further.

id rather just ignore it so there is nothing in writing however it looks like ill have to send it to get it to go away.

im fed up with the whole thing. it a joke and her solicitors are getting paid by her house insurance so they are milking in.

 

[jimster_s]

thanks for the advice.
ill send the letter i put up above and hopefully it will go away.

 

[Dawg]

Might it be, yet again, Pressdam vs Arkell time?

 

[An Oasis]

Nice link M

Just block the old cows access, see how long she wants to put up with pulling bins through her house. Nasty old witch will soon change her tune.

Similar thing happened where we now live. The previous owners of our house got the backs of the neighbours up (they have rights of foot access via the neighbours garden but used to drive a car to up to the garage in the back garden) so the neighbours built a garage that obstructed vehicle access, end of parking the car.

 

[jimster_s]

An Oasis and Dawg - id love to block her access she is an awkward sod, but im all for the quite life. she goes out of her way to cause trouble with anything we do to improve our house. She is old and i think things just play on her mind all day because she has nothing better to do. I dont want to come across as the nasty younger guy im really not.

There is only me and my partner, no pets, no kids, never had a party, and we are hardly ever there. what better neighbour could she ask for. when we are away she goes out of her way to unbolt the gate and take it off the latch so it stays open and swings and bangs all day long. if it carries on ill have to put a lock on it but that will come with more trouble.

its not only us though, she tries to obstruct the house on the other side of us which isnt even attached to ours!!!!

as long as it goes away im happy