Stop arguments!

[Jayne]

Hi,

I think it is a shame when people leave the forum bacause they feel like they are not welcome. The debate about tarrot cards got a little heated between two new members. We asked one of them to stay and now the other one has left. Both are good business women in their own rights.

Please, if a thread is starting to get too heating, maybe admin could lock the thread, before people fall out, or maybe PM the people involved and have a little word.

Thank You

Jayne :D

[clairemackaness]

I agree, there is a very thin line between sarcastic humour and offence on this board. I think if you disagree with a post you should refrain from replying in the thread and take it to a PM.

The old count to Ten theory should be used.

[Rob Holmes]

Hi Jayne,

The thread you are referring to was always risky.

(Not forgetting these are the UK BUSINESS FORUMS) Religion / politics are the 2 'avoidances' in general - even face to face these 2 subjects can really get peoples backs up, but on a forum it's made harder as people can re-read stuff over and over again and get wound up - face to face these 2 people would probably get on well.

Anyway... In response, we DID delete a couple of posts in an attempt to take the steam out of the thread and DID PM the people that posted them - because leaving their posts in would have caused it to flare up even quicker than it did.

It blew up pretty quickly at the end but we were watching it and as soon as we felt it necessary the thread was deleted.

Rob

[cjd]

Tricky isn't it? I found it really interesting. Shame it turned into a witch hunt (oops, here we go again).

I thought that she must have a thick skin to run a business like that and be as open as she was about her beliefs and practises - apparently not.

There's a general rule about these things tho' - you're allowed to criticise beliefs/arguments but not the person having/making them.

[webit]

The was the Amazon thing - 'attack ideas not people.'

[SillyJokes]

You shouldn't have to be nanny.

Perhaps we all got a bit feisty and I certainly regret
what I said and removed the post.

The thing is, this is not an ordinary group of people - most are those that 'think out of the box' and have to live on their own wits therefore question anything hard before investing time in it.

Tarot is controversal and sparked a heated debate. What else would someone expect?

This was an emotive subject and we probably should have been more focused on it's likely success as a business and not whether we agree with the actual service.

There are some businesses here which are successful which I would not use in a million years but I am happy to help them if I can. We should have applied this attitude to Anya's business.

It is a pity people left the forum over it because at least we were talking about them - that can't harm the business too much. I'm sure she would have got some customers here and some great ideas on how to promote her site after the initiation.

[Jayne]

It is sad she left.

But if I felt that strong about something, like someone joining who did kiddy porn stuff, or something bad like that. I too would let rip! But on the subject of tarrot, I Kept pritty quiet. I must admit, I joined in the Carrot reading thread, but I only saw that as fun. :D

I wouldn't leave though, as that would be cutting your nose of to spite your face.

Jayne

[TWD-Tony]

I must admit that I had been following the thread, but even after the first few posts - it looked like a train crash in slow motion... :roll:

I decided not to post in that thread simply because it is sometimes better to stay way out of these things - unfortunately a Mod / Admin cannot afford to do the same and as such I feel sorry for them in these cases... It was a lively debate that deserved to stay - but some poeple took it WAY TO FAR and at that point it was too late.

Personally I don't believe in Tarot / The Stars / Palm Reading or anything like that - but i cannot fault anyone who makes a business out of them... :wink:

[fastfences]

As a business person we have to learn to insulate ourselves from insult and hurt. WE have to accept it. How many times does someone criticise our product during, maybe, a comparison with a competitors?

We can not 'fall to pieces' when promoting our product (or belief). If we have TOTAL confidence in our product/service, and the ability to articulate its merits there is NO REASON why we should pack our bags and go home at the first conflicting opinion over our product.

I speak as one who proffered a 'black cats' comment to anymoo. That, to me, is no different to someone saying to me that fencing is a front for stolen goods, or to goldctrsteve that he is a gold digger.

Maybe this is a 'storm in a teacup' (before the tealeaves were 'read').

Let us all consider how much 'variety' has been thrown at JoyDivision (and I include myself). JD has shown the type of maturity and resilience that winners are made of. Perhaps more should follow his lead!
Cheers, Nigel

[TWD-Tony]

Here we go - I'm sticking my neck out again :lol:

I speak as one who proffered a 'black cats' comment to anymoo. That, to me, is no different to someone saying to me that fencing is a front for stolen goods, or to goldctrsteve that he is a gold digger.


That's not totally true is it mate?

You cannot say that hounding a newbie in a Forum is the same as accusing someone of selling stolen goods???
I realise that some people are "hard" where as some are "sensitive" - but that does not mean that people who are "sensitive" cannot own a business or post in a Forum does it?

I think that by hounding a new member out of this community, and that is what UKBF is - a community, people are probably damaging the site's reputation. I am not accusing anyone for this member feeling that she had to leave - that was her decision, but if someone feels they have to leave because of the reception they get as newbie then that can only damage UKBF (IMHO obviously).

People join UKBF to find out info, gain contacts and leads and sometimes have a laugh :D It should not be upto the minority to tell them that their business / ideas or beliefs are rubbish... Who made this minority a Judge and Jury????

Phew - Glad I got that little lot off my chest!

[Hayles]

I have to agree with Tony. I feel it went too far. However, what's done is done and I'm sure everyone involved will learn from it and think twice next time? :)

[Cornish Steve]

I speak as one who proffered a 'black cats' comment to anymoo.

Even the eloquent Ms. Moo enjoyed the quip about black cats.

[mumper]

You'd have thought that Tarot readers would have seen the argument coming :D

[Jayne]

I tried really hard not to laugh at that John, just in case it upset anyone...sorry I caved :lol: :lol: :lol:

Jayne

[mumper]

Shame on you :D

[fastfences]

Here we go - I'm sticking my neck out again :lol:

I speak as one who proffered a 'black cats' comment to anymoo. That, to me, is no different to someone saying to me that fencing is a front for stolen goods, or to goldctrsteve that he is a gold digger.


That's not totally true is it mate?

You cannot say that hounding a newbie in a Forum is the same as accusing someone of selling stolen goods???



Hi Tony,

This is not really fair. You have chosen to embelish my statement of a 'comment' to the far more serious term of hounding. A single action cannot possibly be 'hounding'; hounding is a continued or collective action or series of actions.

Furthermore, I made no reference to a 'person' accused of selling stolen goods; I had simply alluded to the profession of fencing per se being used in this scenario, i.e. that fencing is a front for stolen goods. I used this as an example becasue it was one such comment that had recently been posted in a moment of joviality by a fellow member. This is a prime example of of us adopting the 'water of a duck's back' syndrome.

I accept your rationale of the hard person/sensitive person issue, but I still maintain that the sensitive person must strive to be a hard person in the business arena.

Guess we'll both go our own way on this.

Cheers and regards, Nigel

[TWD-Tony]

Guess we'll both go our own way on this.

Amen to that! :lol:

(Oops - a Religious Reference! RUN......!!!!!!!!!)

[MinuWeb]

This is one of the reasons that smilies were invented, because quite often people take things the wrong way, but a :P , :lol: or :wink: can show that the comment was made in jest and should not be taken to seriously.

[Jayne]

Good point Tony,

So don't forget, if you want to call someone, a big hairy bum licker...remember your smile :lol:

Jayne

[TWD-Tony]

I can honestly say that I have never called anyone a "a big hairy bum licker" - although I am going to put it on my list of things to do for tommorrow :lol:

[Jayne]

Hi Tony,

I have many more where that came from, if you want any tips, please feel free to PM me :lol: :lol: :lol:

Jayne

[webit]

Stop it all .. right now ... or else I'm posting my picture again ... don't make me bring it out ...

[Jayne]

:lol: :lol: :lol:

They'll ban you for threats like that Webit!

Jayne

[Ozzy]

For bringing it out? or just posting his picture?

[Jayne]

That sounds rude now, you've put it that way Ozzy :lol:

Jayne