View Full Version : My Beautiful Mind!!!
Tiggy
28th September 2005, 17:31
Hi All,
I suppose this post comes under the 'encouragement and inspiration' banner but it's something I wanted to share with you.
I have been in such a dilemma for at least 18 months. Don't really want to go into all the details as spilt guts can be rather unpleasant but the gist of it is that I am trying to shunt my entire life onto a different track. It's always hard enough when it's one area but in this case I mean every important area, as in relationship, financially, career wise, family issues and even where the hell I want to live etc. The issue of time and my age is also a very pertinent factor.
I have felt that my life is like a big, lumpy quilt!! I iron out one area only to find it's now stuffed me up in another and therefore the million and one solutions I come up with are never any good because they never suit the whole agenda.
It is something that has kept me in constant turmoil because my mind has just been going round and round and driving me barmy.
However, lately I realised that I am letting it all get on top of me instead of gaining command of it. I go only so far with my thinking then panic and baulk at the sheer impossibility and of it all, and of what I must lose in one area in order to gain in another.
I decided that I would take the upperhand and demand from myself that I must come up with a desirable and achievable solution which meets all of my objectives. I would no longer accept the view that it is impossible, despite the fact I have been battling with it all for an age. I decided there absolutely is a way through (or around) and I absolutely won't give up until I find it. I decided I will not do what I usually do which is think of something I can do or have and then think 'well it's not what I really want but it's ok and better than x,y and z'; rather like the tail wagging the dog. I now fully intended to have exactly what I have set my mind on.
Although a very positive person, I am not used to being so stubborn and gritty with my thinking.
The fact is since making this distinction, I have been totally amazed at the number of creative possibilities I am now coming up with. Each I idea I had seemed to get closer and closer to hitting the target and finally, after much mental gymnastics, I am amazed to find that I now have literally a perfect solution.
I feel this has been a very valuable lesson for when my business is up and running because I know I will have to adopt this attitude if I am going to get anywhere because the pathway with be littered with obstacles.
It has increased my confidence a thousandfold that I am more than up to the task.
Hope I haven't sounded too Tony Robbins!!!
Tiggy :D
Cornish Steve
28th September 2005, 17:37
Tiggy,
Your words are inspiring. How many of us feel we are walking a treadmill at an ever-increasing pace but never have the courage to step off and pursue a different direction? Sure, there are times in our lives when we can take a risk and times when we cannot, but it's the mode of thinking that's important.
Thanks for sharing your transformation with us, and be sure to pursue the "road less travelled". I'm with you!
Jayne
28th September 2005, 17:40
I know just how you feel, i'm trying to sell my shop, start a new biz, my husbands mother is in hospital. For every one good thing that happens, ten bad come and bite you on the bum :D
I find making lists helps..it sounds daft, but have a go. I do list for everything, from work to cleaning up. I cross off things as they are sorted. Do the rubbish things first, then the list gets easier, put something nice at the bottom (like buy new what ever). Give you something to look forward to. :D And get the jobs done! I do lists for months in advance and all my goals too :D
Chin Up,
Jayne :D
injan
30th September 2005, 13:51
hi ive been there!!
i had a publishing business when 17 through to 21
it all went wrong (i understand this usually happens and has to happen in order to learn and progress to the next level)
it all went wrong when i tried to have a personal life aswell as business
and for the reasons you speak of..
at 21 i then became a hermit for 4 years and studied psychology/ninjutsu and other martial art philosophies etc etc (the roadless travelled_yes what a book!!)
I am now 34 and have a completely different stance and view about business..
i found in the end at 21 i had ended up infested by leaches and parasites
most of them were my friends and family all wanting to have what i had...the high flying image i had created for myself
1. what i have learnt is that one has to try to erradicate personal problems(hangups) and the desire for power/self image/etc etc
2 Richard Brandson wouldnt agree with me here but i have also learnt to 'be humble' - one may for example pretend to be a cleaner or menial worker within the business, whilst the LTD company address and name may reside in kingston, Jamaica or Litchensteign as an example of strategic addresses where you can send people..(never use your home address) always have a seperate address even if it is just a POBOX or office services...
also if everything is in writing to that address it means you have breathing space to think about your reply...never get trapped in a corner...
you are then free to choose the part of the business where you can be active (eg: a local(sub contracted) office secretary) and where you will then find yourself in a unique position where you find out the truth from people about what a C**t the 'owner' is and who's gonna cause mutiny first etc etc_ i say subcontracted because then you can get close to the competition telling them how low your pay is and how crap your employer is whilst finding out from them what THEY the competition are GOING to do!! LOL!!! essentually in this way you can be your own spy and its FUN!!
this is classic Ninpo (ninjutsu)
always be in a position to surprise the enemy because traditional approaches lead to traditional conflict...
the art of 'knowing everything' and the truth about whats going on in the business...
if you make a mistake and let a family/friend know you are the one
then remember you can always 'sell' to some other big corporate name youve made-up if you ever find yourself in a corner...
stay free
fly with the wind!
but remember hang-ups and self richeousness will kill you
Injan
Cornish Steve
30th September 2005, 14:09
Richard Branson wouldnt agree with me here but i have also learnt to 'be humble'
I agree with you 110 percent! Does that make up for Mr. Branson disagreeing with you? :)
Let's not assume that leaders most often in the news are industry's greatest leaders. One wellknown book (I think it's "Good to Great") points out that the most successful business leaders tend to be quiet and self-effacing (yet very driven). By definition, they stay away from the limelight.
Empty vessels often make the most noise.
Tiggy
30th September 2005, 14:55
Thankyou Steve, Jayne and Injan.
Since this turning point has happened I feel like I am inhabiting a different universe. It is truly amazing. Nothing seems to phase me and yet I am more grounded than ever.
I have believed for many years that life will only give me what I expect. I now know this to be false. Most people expect the best that life can give (or they think they expect it) and still end up living lives of 'quiet desperation' - so true, Mr Whitman.
Also I have learnt that to believe you will get the live you deserve is false. Deserving, justice and fairness do not come into it. I am saying this is in a totally non combative way; it is just cool fact.
I now believe that you get the life that you demand. Not demanding as in foot-stamping and throwing your weight about, but demanding in the sense of being very clear about what life you want to be living and refusing to settle for anything else. In some cases this distinction can launch you on your new path straight away. In others it's just a matter of time.
I have learnt that once on the path of your choosing the sheer joy of just knowing you are in the right place makes just the journey on its own a magical experience. The planned outcome becomes the icing on the cake.
Tiggy :)
injan
30th September 2005, 15:09
I now believe that you get the life that you demand. Not demanding as in foot-stamping and throwing your weight about, but demanding in the sense of being very clear about what life you want to be living and refusing to settle for anything else. In some cases this distinction can launch you on your new path straight away. In others it's just a matter of time.
I have learnt that once on the path of your choosing the sheer joy of just knowing you are in the right place makes just the journey on its own a magical experience. The planned outcome becomes the icing on the cake.
Tiggy :)
i think religious beleifs (your calling), and harmony with nature is important if it is not already in ones knowledge base...we can only be what we know, the more we know the more accurate and balanced we can be... eg your next car may well be electric! you may switch to a green energy supplier, you may offer opportunities for the poor within your business structure etc etc etc
sometime what feels nice isnt always what is accurate and true...the key here is knowledge, by knowing we can be accurate thus promoting good feeling....
I think you're doing the right thing going with your feelings and how you feel, but remember not to sacrifice a good feeling for the ignorance of the truth that new knowledge may give you...
the meak shall inherit the earth!
Tiggy
30th September 2005, 15:26
Thanks Injan. I hear what you're saying. Personally speaking though, all being meek ever did for me was give me an inferiority complex, a stammer and was a green light to everyone else to walk all over me.
Tiggy :wink:
injan
30th September 2005, 15:37
Thanks Injan. I hear what you're saying. Personally speaking though, all being meek ever did for me was give me an inferiority complex, a stammer and was a green light to everyone else to walk all over me.
Tiggy :wink:
to give you strength
as an example_consider how much you could make selling electric cars!!??
i cant see how this would attract any bullying/inferiority
on the contrary
i think being meek is meant to be personal to you and the source of your decision about where the path is leading so you can make accurate decisions....whilst at the same time fullfilling your personal and business goals/needs
i'm not saying anyone should for example become a martyr or jesus or fanatic in any way...all aspects of your requirements should be taken into consideration... ie well rounded(accurate/true)
you may have to use a petrol car to get to meetings to set up an electricar business......sacrifices may have to be made...
so one doesnt fall into a corner with any fanatical beleifs...
now ive got a headache
LOL :x
what does steve think??
back later or tomorrow..
Tiggy
30th September 2005, 15:52
Thanks Injan. I hear what you're saying. Personally speaking though, all being meek ever did for me was give me an inferiority complex, a stammer and was a green light to everyone else to walk all over me.
Tiggy :wink:
to give you strength
as an example_consider how much you could make selling electric cars!!??
i cant see how this would attract any bullying/inferiority
on the contrary
i think being meek is meant to be personal to you and the source of your decision about where the path is leading so you can make accurate decisions....whilst at the same time fullfilling your personal and business goals/needs
i'm not saying anyone should for example become a martyr or jesus or fanatic in any way...all aspects of your requirements should be taken into consideration... ie well rounded(accurate/true)
you may have to use a petrol car to get to meetings to set up an electricar business......sacrifices may have to be made...
so one doesnt fall into a corner with any fanatical beleifs...
now ive got a headache
LOL :x
what does steve think??
back later or tomorrow..
I'm not really sure what all this is about electric cars!! :lol: :lol:
Have you invented one and are looking for a business angel? :D
In a way being meek has made me strong - 30 years of meekness and all that it brings have played a part in helping me to uncover and ulitilise the abundant strength that I have been in possession of all along.
However, I am wondering if you and I are interpreting the word ' meek' in two different ways..??!!
Tiggy
Cornish Steve
30th September 2005, 16:41
I am wondering if you and I are interpreting the word ' meek' in two different ways..??!!
Meekness is a misunderstood word, that's for sure. I would define it as self-confidence without ego. So as not to cause further confusion, I suggest that self-confidence is something internal whereas ego is something external. It's possible to have a giant ego but no self-confidence.
According to this definition, meekness is a strength but something rarely encountered. I think it's something to cultivate in a business leader.
Has anyone ever read the book "The Generosity Factor"? It's based on the life of Truett Cathy (founder of the Chick-Fil-A restaurant chain in the US). I have some friends who know him personally, and they say he is a most extraordinary person. To me, he illustrates wonderfully how meekness can turn a great leader into a remarkable leader.
Tiggy
30th September 2005, 17:07
In that case we are hearing two different things when we hear the word meek.
I hear the dictionary definition which reads 'easily imposed upon, submissive, weak and shamefaced'.
What you hear is more in line with the dictionary definition which reads 'showing patience, humility and gentle'
I see easily imposed upon and submissive as qualities I do not wish to have. I see patience, humility and gentleness as qualities I greatly aspire to.
Tiggy :)
Cornish Steve
30th September 2005, 17:22
In that case we are hearing two different things when we hear the word meek.
I hear the dictionary definition which reads 'easily imposed upon, submissive, weak and shamefaced'.
What you hear is more in line with the dictionary definition which reads 'showing patience, humility and gentle'
I see easily imposed upon and submissive as qualities I do not wish to have. I see patience, humility and gentleness as qualities I greatly aspire to.
Tiggy :)
Most definitely, I mean the second definition. To me, the first definition applies to weakness.
This exercise just goes to show how different interpretations of a single word cause confusion and misunderstanding. I admit that I am probably taking the minority interpretation of meekness.
injan
30th September 2005, 17:58
I think to round off the meaning of meekness
requires the last definition
'always wanting to know'
which i guess cultivates understanding and wisdom
and sometimes requires humility to gain such information or to be able to understand it..
examples
why is a tramp a tramp?
why did hitla do what he did_according to him?
why is there a gap between rich and poor?
why are people eager to disprove global warming?
and ultimately why/how are we here?
a meek person is always at peace with everyone and everything simply by his understanding...
ultimately the meek shall always know the correct action and judgement about 'what to do' in a situation for the benefit of all (but is often humiliated by trying)
essentially preperation in order to become 'the ultimate leader'
as for how to take correct action(influence) to put things right_ without being humilliated
well thats a different story as i understand it..
i think in the east they call that ZEN (energy)
the meek shall inherit the earth..
ZEN shall conquor!
from a martial arts perspective my uderstanding is that the meeker you are(ie the more rounded your understanding is) the more powerfull your zen kee energy can become and the bigger and bigger situations you are able to dissolve..
like maybe the sort of person needed in iraque right now..
Tiggy
30th September 2005, 22:57
While we're on the subject, check out this - it's so cool.
http://www.osholeela.com/taichiquotes.html
T :)
clickprofits
2nd October 2005, 05:19
Dear all,
I am passing this on to you because it definitely worked for me, and we
could all do with a little calm in our mad world
By following the simple advice I read in an article, I have finally found
inner peace. The article read: "The way to achieve inner peace is to finish
off all the things you have started."
So I looked round the house to see all the things I had started and hadn't
finished ... and before leaving the house this morning I finished off a
bottle of red wine, a bottle of white wine, the Baileys, three Bacardi
Breezers, the Jack Daniels, the Prozac, some Valium, some cheesecake and a box of chocolates. You have no idea how bloody good I feel.
You must pass this on to those you feel are in need of inner peace
Jayne
2nd October 2005, 09:02
Dear all,
I am passing this on to you because it definitely worked for me, and we
could all do with a little calm in our mad world
By following the simple advice I read in an article, I have finally found
inner peace. The article read: "The way to achieve inner peace is to finish
off all the things you have started."
So I looked round the house to see all the things I had started and hadn't
finished ... and before leaving the house this morning I finished off a
bottle of red wine, a bottle of white wine, the Baileys, three Bacardi
Breezers, the Jack Daniels, the Prozac, some Valium, some cheesecake and a box of chocolates. You have no idea how bloody good I feel.
You must pass this on to those you feel are in need of inner peace
My husband has just read this and agrees with you, going to check the house out later for left overs :lol: Excellent post :lol:
Jayne
injan
2nd October 2005, 19:40
Jayne:
click:
LOL TISFF :P :P :P :D :D :D
my aunty has that attitude, ive just got to ring her and tell her this!! keeps me sane!!! it can all become so serious sometimes with us business people and our power theories and meditation etc...I mean not surprisingly so, as often maybe we are dealing with large amounts of money and powerfull situations/people...
this attitude is brilliant!! keeps us all sane!! thanks for being here!!!
I'll remember to get some more Baileys in next time i'm at the shops!!
now where's that ice cream :)
Tiggy: spot on with the Tai Chi!! :)